Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Kate's TaLENT for Bad Ideas

So it's out there now, which means I have to stick it out for the next 40 days. And, even after a week I still have 39 days to go. How is that?? Because, haha, what I learned this weekend? Lent is actually 46 days. Fan. Tas. Tic.

For those who don't know, I announced last week that I have given up wine for Lent. Which is so funny. Because I. Gave. Up. Wine. When I said I was doing it, McGee got this incredulous look on her face and said, "You? Giving up wine? Seriously?" So she had to give up Wii. I would haha, but I had to give up wine.

And that's not even the least of it. Wine is sorta like my bottom line. I may have a cosmopolitan when I'm out, or even a Vodka & Tonic during the summer when I feel like playing bartender, but I'm not much of a drinker besides wine. So, while all of you who suggested vodka, or bourbon, or flat-out shots of tequila with a Jaegermeister chaser, that's -- awesome. -- but maybe not where I'm headed.

Basically, it's translating into I've given up drinking for -- sigh -- 39 more days.

And dessert.

And my favorite snack food.

Because I'm a moron. A pious moron, but a moron nevertheless.

And, I'm not even Catholic. McLovin is...even though he insists that St. Patrick's Day doesn't count. I totally call bullsh*t on that. But, the whole family has adopted Lent as a way to thank him for doing basically everything else all Protestant-y. So, McGee has given up Wii, Lefty has given up desserts, and Happy has apparently given up trying to even kid us that he's a good boy. Ever.

So far, Happy has been the most successful Lent-er.

So, where do I stand, on Day 8? My kitchen has been woefully neglected. I once told you all how much I love it, despite its tiny-ness and stupid layout. I would linger in there and make dinner and random little treats and surprises for lunches. But, admittedly, it was done with a glass of wine nearby. Now dinner is like Operation SlamSomeFoodOnTheTable. I'm like the Marines; quick in, annihilate everything, vanish. And, since 3 of the 5 of us are dessert-free, the other two have to sorta suck it up. Cuz I'm not gonna make stuff that I can't have. That's just mean. To me.

Lunches are quickly regressing too. Gone are the deluxe sandwiches cut out with cookie cutters into the shape of, oh, rabbits, George Washington & Abraham Lincoln (for President's Day...it was awesome...) or Texas. Now there are just square slabs of PB&J. Unpeeled oranges. Saltine crackers. My kids, who are such foodies and would happily take a lunch of brie and baguettes and grapes with a rough cut of dark chocolate for dessert, are now saying, "Nah, it's OK mom. I'll just buy the hummus biteable at school for lunch today." And then sloffing out of the room like they have lead fins attached to their feet.

And, hummus biteable? I'm sorry, school lunch ladies, but that just sounds foul. It reminds me of those "Crustables" -- those frozen PB&J sandwich like things in a pastry...but rather when you bite into the encasing -- could be anything -- you get a blob of preservative laden hummus sqooshed into your mouth. Ugh.

So, Day 8. It's already time for a re-vamping.

Cowboy up, Kate. You are totally hard core about Lent. [talking to self like a Marine] WHAT ARE YOU SOME LITTLE GIRL YOU GET OUT THERE AND KICK LENT'S ASS BEFORE I HAVE TO SHOW UP AND TELL YOU HOW TO GET THIS DONE!!

So, to the open bottle of Prosecco in the fridge, and the open bottle of Pinot Noir on the bar, and the easily openable T-Box in the pantry? Bring it on. I'm like Rocky over here.

Too bad the wine is the Russian dude with the hair.

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9 comments:

  1. Did you know that Catholics get Sunday "off" from their lenten obligations? Sundays do NOT count. I'm Catholic but cannot remember exactly what the reasoning is. So, if you want to pretend you're Catholic, have a glass (or two, or three) of wine on Sundays. Just thought you might like to know. Megan

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    Replies
    1. Because Sundays are feast days and you have to feast on feast days! Also, Lent ends on Holy Thursday evening, so...3 less days than you think!!

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  2. I don't do lent - I decided to just put it into overdrive straight to hell! And I am taking the kids with me!

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  3. Sundays are not 'lent' because each Sunday is like a 'Mini Easter'. We celebrate the resurrection of Jesus each and every Sunday at Mass, and therefore, is not technically counted in the 40 days. Some Catholics still choose to offer their sacrifices on Sundays, but some don't, because they are not part of the '40 days'.

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  4. Ouch. I couldn't give up wine. I'm not a HUGE drinker of anything other than wine, either. But I will share with you my only other "must have" recipe in case it helps. Of course, you have to search out Stirrings Spiced Apple post-Christmas so it could be a feat...

    It's too hard to write in here. I'll email it.

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  5. The idea of Lent is to “give up” something in order to remind you what God gave up at (Easter) time. The reason you get a free pass on Sunday is because our Lord wants you to celebrate Him on this day, and not bemoan the fact that you gave up something for Him (He knows you know what He gave up, because you are participating in Lent). Of course, you are not supposed to have what you “gave up” on Sunday till after Mass, but I think going to Church counts! So, if you go to Church on Sunday, then, you are allowed to celebrate our Lord by having what you gave up, thus making it more enjoyable... Of course, celebrating with wine is debatable, but, hey, Jesus did it, so it can't be all bad!
    This is my understanding, and I could be wrong, but that's how it was explained to me.

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  6. I actually teach CCD and the Sunday pass came up this week in class. (I gave up coffee last year and wish I had known the Sunday exception then!) Our priest confirmed that Sundays do not count as part of Lent and if you go to church it should be fine to celebrate God's love with whatever you have given up. I have to say also that in Irish households in particular, St. Patrick's Day is special during Lent. Enjoy your Sundays!

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  7. 40 days without wine is...

    ...better than 40 weeks without wine?

    At least Lent, unlike pregnancy, doesn't come with swollen ankles and leg cramps in the middle of the night. And labor.

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  8. I know this is way late, but McLovin's right. I was raised Catholic and I remember that whenever St. Paddy's Day fell on a Friday, the Archbishop would grant a dispensation and allow us to eat corned beef and cabbage. And the Sunday thing is right, too. Count the days from Ash Wednesday to Easter and you'll see that the Sundays just don't count. :o)

    ReplyDelete

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