No. we're not going for chic here. We're going for statement. And that statement is "Aww, hell no." A sampling of the clothing we've had to emphatically decline:
10. Perfectly cute royal blue t-shirt, that is apparently too boxy so McGee feels the ridiculous need to put a ponytail holder on the back to make it tighter (where did they get this idea?) so that Kate can see the exact outline of her bra. With the notable exception that is says LUST across the chest. In gold glittery letters. This was an eight minute long battle. Mostly because Kate wouldn't define "lust" and therefore, according to McGee, it must not be that bad.
7. Little girls need white sandals. These sandals should not have high heels. Try finding a pair that were not intended for doing the cha cha with Danny Zucko or looking like a Little Miss Perfect reject and I will pay you $20.
6. Again, cute blue t-shirt. With a happy face on it. Passed Kate's rigorous tests for appropriateness and quality. Purchased. Upon first wearing, Kate notices the eyes are exactly where McGee's boobs are, effectively challenging any non-vision-impaired person to NOT look at her chest. Super.
5. Christmas underwear. On the bum says "Santa, I was good for Christmas" On the BUM? Why would Santa be reading a Girl's Size 7 panties with writing on the bum? Freaks.
3. MC Esher inspried black t-shirt depicting two arms crossing over the torso. In each hand? A gun. Why don't we just lock down the schools now?
2. String, animal-print bikinis with black lace trim in the toddler section. Are you f*^&ing kidding me? Unless this is a Dateline-type ploy to trap and incarcerate sex offenders, this stuff should not be allowed. Aside from the fact that we think whoever designed this should be greeted by Chris Hanson. Creep.
1. Little girl Easter dresses that could easily double as evening wear for the Bratz Grrlz. What?! What happened to sweet, old-fashioned Laura Ashley dresses? Now it's like Ashlee Simpson instead...who wears black on Easter? Please. One day a year - or, more accurately, one morning a year - can we please just wear polka dots and florals and bows and everyone just be fine with that? Thanks.
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