My family is eating dinner. Here's our conversation.
Lydia: "What should we get Daddy for Father's Day?"
Hawk (age 5): (serious as a heart attack and without missing a beat) "Adult diapers."
Thumbelina (age 7): "Yes!"
Mini-mini-me (age 19 months): "Bipers!"
Lydia: "Anything else?"
Thumbelina: "I know something. Daddy needs butterfly-shaped glasses."
Lydia and Cap'n silently make eye contact. The child is Dame Edna.
Lydia: "Can you really see Daddy wearing those? Like to work?"
Thumbelina: (nods enthusiastically) "Oh yes."
Lydia: "Anything else?"
Hawk: "MIND CONTROL."
The Cap'n: "I'm intrigued by that idea, son. Tell me more."
Hawk: "Its like in Star Wars when the mind control goes humping through your whole body."
Lydia: "It goes humping? Through your whole body?"
Hawk: (sighs) "Yes."
Thumbelina: "Hmmmm... What about a box?"
Thumbelina: "And decorate it!"
Mini-mini-me: "Oooh! Oooh! Aaah!"
Judging by this conversation, the Cap'n is going to have a very special Father's Day.
Subscribe in a reader
(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2010
Guru Louise and I asked you about what most teachers really want for end of the year gifts. We got hundreds of answers on Facebook , Tw...
So last summer, my youngest daughter (age 5) began seeing previews for a new Dora show called Dora and Friends: Into the City! Gone was th...
Whole30 Day 0: Later this week, I'm starting a diet/nutrition/sadness program called Whole30 . Where you eat nothing but strict Pa...
HOW TO DRIVE YOUR MOTHER CRAZY BEFORE 8AM (in just 21 easy steps) 1. In the middle of the night, go stand next to your mother’s bed, a...
We’ve had a lot of people ask us to write a post about the seemingly innocent topic of the Mother-in-Law. Seriously, people? Are you kidding...
It seems to me that one of the most important things that no one told me about parenthood is that three is worse than two. Everyone is sort ...
When I got the email with this guest post in it, I was very happy because I know a bunch of moms with ADD or ADHD - and you know what? ...
A couple of weeks ago, we asked you for your thoughts on ways that kids can help in their communities. Why? Because we want to raise li...
This was originally published in May 2010: In the past 24 hours, I have gotten three phone calls from friends of mine and they all starte...
Facebook just showed me a photo from a year ago. It was the day my daughter threw a Halloween party at the Katherine Hanley Family Shelt...