Thursday, August 26, 2010

Happy Birthday: The Funniest F**king Thing I Heard All Day:

So I take McGee to her BFFs house for a birthday sleepover and I'm chatting up the mom.  And the boys are running around like they've been cooped up for the last 23 hours and its recreation time and you know when they leave the dog is going to finally collapse because they were all over her for a half hour. And then they say things like "Mom, can we get a dog that's fun like this? Our dog is old and -- oh, I just stepped in poop. Let's go home" and immediately get into my just-cleaned-vacuumed-shampooed car and who am I kidding thinking I can keep my car poop-free for 8 minutes?

The point is, I look around the house and it's strangely quiet.

Me: Where's [older sister] Marsha?
Birthday Mom: Gone.
Me: Really? And, [older brother] Greg?
Birthday Mom: Nope. Not here either.
Me: Dad?
Birthday Mom: Nuh-uh. That's what Jan wanted for her birthday present. For all of us to leave. Well, I can't leave, but I'm supposed to pretend I'm not here.
Me: *gasps* She's a genius.
Birthday Mom: Yeah. I'm totally asking for that for my birthday next year.

The. End.
(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2010

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