SCROLL TO THE BOTTOM FOR THE WINNING CAPTION!
We let Grandmere pick because Kate & I were too busy laughing like a couple of crazed hyenas.
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We are so in love with the crazy Thanksgiving turkey that Kate's mother-in-law made in the murtherfurkin dishwasher that we've decided to have a little caption contest. Take a good, long look at the turkey's "face" and if you have an idea for a caption for this truly whucktastic photo, leave us a comment and we'll pick a winner and announce it Sunday night.
So... What is this turkey saying to you? We are dying to know - as most of the time the comments on this blog are funnier than the posts. The winner gets three things:
- Recognition as being the most clever and funny girl in MommyLand (we will even put up your picture if you want)
- Gets to come up with any topic she wants as a challenge post for us to write
- Will receive a special treat in the mail from Kate & Lydia just in time for the festive holiday season!
PS: Also, we should say that we are fully copying the idea of a caption contest from the hilarious and awesome Mommy Shorts, who you should totally check out if you have a minute.
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Here's the turkey and the winning caption.
Grandmere roasted the turkey in the dishwasher
and then she picked the winner of this contest.
And we let her do it...
And we let her do it...
Best random movie reference: "There is no Turkey, there is only Zuul." - Melanie C.
Best use of the word contortionist: "Contortionist turkey had never lost a drinking contest.. till she met Kate and Lydia." - Cherie
Best True Blood shout out: "I think Lafayette says it best:"B*tch, you come in my house, you eat my food the way i f***ing make it! You understand me? Tip your waitress." - Mama Chaos
Best use of total freaking randomness: "Don't ask me why I was stringing the lights naked, just help me get my knees outta here." -Penny Broom
Best reference to the underworld: "Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial." - Kimberly
Best UsWeekly exclusive interview caption: "First mistake - I go into a hotel room with Charlie Sheen. Next thing I know, I wake up in a dishwasher with my legs in my mouth a chatty older woman in the next room and my picture on a website. Good Gobble, no more celebrities." - Anonymous
Best alarming and somewhat threatening caption: ""My giblets are probably frolicking somewhere with your pelvic floor. So wipe that smile off your face, snitch." - MLV
Best translated caption and also Best Star Wars reference: "Achute, my pee kasa Jabba. Ha, ha, ha!"
~spoken in Jabba the Hutt's voice...and yes, I Googled how to say "Hello, my name is..." in "Huttese". - Kim
Best naughty caption: "Is that a baster in your apron or are you just happy to see me?" - Jet
Best Chuck Norris reference: "This photo was taken 30 seconds before dinner at Chuck Norris's house. On Thanksgiving, the turkeys give thanks to Chuck Norris or he cooks them instantly with his rage." - Kate in Michigan
Best responsive after dinner caption: "Do you have a mint?" - Erin Jones
(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2010
Ethel! Where's my dam teeth!!!!!
ReplyDelete"Duuuude....trust me. I'm just as surprised and horrified as you are."
ReplyDeleteUm... pretty sure we decided we need wine before we can participate in this AWESOME contest....
ReplyDeleteSkinny Bitch and Fat Girl!!
"Wha? Ever hear of knocking???"
ReplyDeleteStuff this!
ReplyDeleteOpen up and say AHHH.
ReplyDeleteLuke - I am your father.
ReplyDeleteHey Baby, stuff me!
ReplyDeleteMunch munch! Meat the screaming turkey!
ReplyDelete(Munch was the artist who made the painting titled the scream...google it and you'll see exactly what I mean)
I am the love child of Preditor and Alien. Where is Ripley and Dutch?
ReplyDelete(I can't get over the fact how much this looks like both fo those things)
I told you TOFURKEY! Now my face will haunt you every time you get out the china and wonder what happened to the "good" table cloth!
ReplyDeleteDo you think I should have my eyebrows done too? Or would that be too much?
ReplyDeletetune in tokyo, tune in tokyo
ReplyDeleteDon't hate me because I'm beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI was sure I had some bronzer in here somewhere...
ReplyDeleteTry to stuff me, and you'll pull back a stump!
ReplyDeleteYes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
ReplyDeleteWell, there went *my* Thanksgiving! I hope you people are happy!
ReplyDeleteDon't ask me why I was stringing the lights naked, just help me get my knees outta here.
ReplyDeleteI'm shocked 'cause I never thought you snitches would find me in the dishwasher. Randy gave me the idea.
ReplyDeleteYa know.... it's not too late to get the ham outta the fridge...
ReplyDelete"Once again, Lindsay Lohan gets caught with her hands down her pants... "
ReplyDeletePlease pass the pumpkin pie....
ReplyDeleteYou're going to stuff what..where?! Not just No..HELL NO!!!
ReplyDelete"I'll be back!!"
ReplyDeleteDamn, it's hot in here! Where's my T-box?
ReplyDeleteShut the damn door!
ReplyDeleteGet out of my sun I'm tanning here!
ReplyDeleteJust another foot in the mouth moment. Mom said shed wash my mouth out but I didn't think shed use the dishwasher.
ReplyDeleteWhuck, how did my murtherfurking legs get in my mouth?
ReplyDeleteI feel so empty :( Gonna go put my head in the oven. Goodbye cruel world.
ReplyDeleteThere is no Turkey, there is only Zuul.
ReplyDeleteLet's see YOU stick your legs in your mouth and still smile.
ReplyDeleteI'm ready to get stuffed! Nom nom nom nom....
ReplyDeleteAhh! I feel so... naked and exposed!
ReplyDeleteSee?? I TOLD you this Poligrip Denture Cream was defective!!
ReplyDeleteI think Lafayette says it best:"B*tch, you come in my house, you eat my food the way i f***ing make it! You understand me? Tip your waitress."
ReplyDelete...D'OH!
ReplyDeleteAaaahhhh!
ReplyDeleteThis just sings "ban de soliel: for the central bay tan" to me. Likely because I am so very mommy tired, old, and prone to being stuck on songs from commercials. And it looks like it's wearing freaky sunglasses. I mean, "stylish."
ReplyDeleteI just got Joey to get his head out, now YOU want in?
ReplyDelete"I'm the Ghost of Thanksgiving Past..."
ReplyDeleteNo....Ima gonna eat YOUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteFor the love of Maude, how many cycles have I been through now?
ReplyDelete"I guess this serves me right for talking out my ass."
ReplyDeletecontortionist turkey had never lost a drinking contest.. till she met Kate and Lydia.
ReplyDelete"Mom was right. If your keep making that face it's going to stick that way."
ReplyDeleteLeigh Ann
Oops, "you".
ReplyDeleteLeigh Ann
Jillian Michaels circa Day 31 of The Shred.
ReplyDeleteFirst mistake - I go into a hotel room with Charlie Sheen. Next thing I know, I wake up in a dishwasher with my legs in my mouth a chatty older woman in the next room and my picture on a website. Good Gobble, no more celebrities.
ReplyDeleteSeriously? THIS is my last photo? I feel dirty. Don't tell my mom.
ReplyDeleteAnd you snitches thought at trip to the Gyno was rough.
ReplyDeleteThe studio is just waiting for J.Lo to sign on and then we're all set to start filming Anaconda II!
ReplyDelete(Thanks for the mention!)
Eat me and I'll introduce you to my friend- Sally Monella
ReplyDeleteMahna, mahna!
ReplyDelete"In a world filled with botox and silicone, it's really refreshing to find a chick with big, beautiful breasts, a sparkling smile AND a fantastic personality..."
ReplyDeleteFeeeeeeedddddd Meeeeeeee.....
ReplyDeleteWhen I said, "Take me to your leader" I didn't mean Grandma.... I guess I picked the wrong time of year to let you all in on the fact that Turkeys can really talk.... and aren't stupid. Doh. That freakin Duck got us again.
ReplyDeleteBehold the MAW from the dark nekkid side.
ReplyDeleteMAW HAW HAW!
Made by MAW in law.
Do you want MAW body?
"Oh, Brett Farve sent me a picture? How awesome! Whuck?!!!!!"
ReplyDelete"Why so serious?"
ReplyDeleteGUH, that thing is creepy!
Go ahead. Put your hand in there. I dare you.
ReplyDeleteDo these glasses make me look fat?
ReplyDelete"Usually something bare and, um, hairless wearing only a bead on a string would not be found on this blog."
ReplyDelete"Am I talking out of my a$$ again?"
"I know, I look alarmed, but put the heat on me and I'll be golden in no time."
"My giblets are probably frolicking somewhere with your pelvic floor. So wipe that smile off your face, snitch."
If YOU can bedazzle your vajayjay, surely you can do better for an old bird than these two friggin beads.
ReplyDeleteImagine your clothes were stripped off that had directions printed with your demise, such as 15 minutes per pound and your last meal on earth was to include your vital organs boiled into dressing something cheaper than wonder bread...you'd look like this too.
ReplyDeleteNow I can't stop, so here's a few more:
ReplyDeleteDoes this string make me look fat?
It's all fun and games until someone loses their giblets.
Thanksgiving turkeys have a lot in common with moms. It takes a long time to prepare them and then ungrateful IHP ravage you without a second thought in mere minutes.
Okay, last one, for real:
ReplyDeletePluck you.
Next time I'll "invite" you to dinner!
ReplyDeleteStuff it Fancy.
ReplyDeleteOr...
Megatron says whuck?
I gotta pee so bad! I can't shove my legs any higher and my eyeballs are turning yellow! (if there was video, this turkey is actually doing the pee-pee dance and screaming the above statement!)
ReplyDeleteI am NOT a turkey...I am Mr. Clean. I swear.
ReplyDeleteRAWR! I can has stuffen?
ReplyDeleteDue to the economy, The Joneses had to get the cheap turkey this year. Only to the embarrassment of all, they forgot to take her pasties off before cooking and one of the frequenters of The Jerky Turkey Strip Club recognized his dinner. No one will look at Uncle Albert the same again.
ReplyDeleteCascade...take me away!
ReplyDeleteIs that a baster in your apron or are you just happy to see me?
ReplyDelete"Achute, my pee kasa Jabba. Ha, ha, ha!"
ReplyDelete~spoken in Jabba the Hutt's voice...and yes, I Googled how to say "Hello, my name is..." in "Huttese".
A stretched out bajingo and who knows what hanging off my nipples... welcome to mommyhood!
ReplyDeleteAll I want for Christmas is my two front teeth!
ReplyDeleteWanna see me pull my bottom lip over my head?
ReplyDeleteStuff THIS in your piehole.
ReplyDeleteThis photo was taken 30 seconds before dinner at Chuck Norris's house. On Thanksgiving, the turkeys give thanks to Chuck Norris or he cooks them instantly with his rage.
ReplyDelete--kate in Michigan
"You have been Bob-matized"
ReplyDelete(OK, this was my initial reaction, but it only makes sense for those who attend the Ded Bob Sho at Ren Fests)
You said you were gonna stick your foot in my a$$. I thought I would save you the trouble.
ReplyDeleteScrew the Dingo, I ate your baby.
ReplyDeleteSuck it, Fancy.
ReplyDeletecan't .. be ... witty ... - ... laughing ... too ... hard.....
ReplyDeleteNasty Pilgrim, go find a sheep.
ReplyDeleteHow about?
ReplyDelete"what are YOU lookin' at?"
I wish you'd just pull your bottom lip up over your head and swallow !!!
ReplyDelete~Ali T
Bazinga!
ReplyDeleteFeed me, Stheemore.
ReplyDeleteHey, hey apple! Hehheheheheh.
ReplyDeleteWhat has been seen can not be unseen....
ReplyDeleteGive it to me baby, uh huh uh huh. And all the girlies say im pretty fly for a white guy.
ReplyDeleteI bet your husband wished you were this flexible.
ReplyDeleteReincarnation sucks.
ReplyDelete"I would have gotten away with it if it wasn't for that meddling Kate."
ReplyDeleteEAT ME AND DIE
ReplyDelete"Um... this isn't what it looks like. Really."
ReplyDelete"Know this, only one may enter here. One whose worth lies far within. The diamond in the rough."
ReplyDelete~The Cave of Wonders (Aladdin)
Braiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnsssssssssssssssss
ReplyDeleteWTF - why the face?
ReplyDeleteThis is not the turkey you are looking for...
ReplyDeleteHonestly everybody, I won those eight Olympic gold medals fair and square. No performance enhancing injections required!
ReplyDeleteIt's been ages since I've hit the tanning booth...
ReplyDeleteDo you have a mint?
ReplyDeleteOh turdish eye-slam! Bring me a rake and a hefty bag for this dead bird!
ReplyDeleteEither "I am not a crook" or " I'm stuffed! That's what she said!"
ReplyDelete"Furck You. I look totally HAWT."
ReplyDelete"The old bird sure can take a lot of stuffing." "That's what he said."
ReplyDeleteOHMYMAUDEOHMYMAUDEOHMYMAUDE!
ReplyDeleteI made it onto your list!!
*doing the dorky 'kate in Michigan' dance*
I. Am. Thrilled.
But Chuck Norris would like to have a word with you two.
many hugs xoxox
kate in Michigan
Feed me, Seymour!
ReplyDelete