Thursday, January 12, 2012

Lyric Logic - Kid Style

Last night, my 6 yr old son Hawk & I got in a fight. Apparently, it's perfectly fine to say "boobs" because why else would it be in the song that EVERYONE knows?

"What song?" I asked. He gave me a patronizing stare, sighed and said:"Boobs Like Jaggar." He then walked away, shaking his head.


I love being patronized by a first grader.

So I posted it on Facebook. And the mommies on our FB wall started posting things back like:


- My kids thinks that song is about cows. MOOOOOOOOOOOOOO's like Jaggar.
- My friend's kid once sang "Shake it like a polar bear picture!"
- My kid heard "Like a G-6" and was sure it said "Like a Cheese Stick". It's better that way.

It occurred to me that in all of the posts we've done about kids and the funny stuff they say and draw, that we've never done a post on the very creative way they interpret song lyrics. If you have an awesome and unintentionally hilarious example of how your kid interprets the words to a popular song, leave us a comment.

We'll compile the best and funniest into a top ten list and award the winner something amazing like, the HONOR of winning. So pretty much nothing. Sorry. We suck. Plus we gave all our money to hookers so we're broke.

xo, Kate & Lydia

(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011

243 comments:

  1. My 3 year old's favorite song that he asks for all the time: "Pumped up Dicks"

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    1. Lololololol......I really didn't need to read past this one. This trumps anything else by default.

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    2. My daughters LOVE that song, but do to the actual lyrics, I convinced them that the chorus was "better run better run, faster than the sun" and "faster than the sunset". I've had a couple of friends steal my remade lyrics, because let's face it, it's a catchy little song and you can't help but like the beat. In other words, it's got a good beat and you can dance to it, I give it an 85 :)

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  2. "I got patches on my pants and I ain't afraid to show 'em... I'm sixty and I know it..."

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    Replies
    1. My daughter's version of "You are my Sunshine" goes something like this:
      Do you know my sunshine? You know you happy? You guys are great! You never know dear, you guys I love you!! Don't take my sunshine away"

      And I caught it on video here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmaz7AvWdPs&feature=autoplay&list=UUvlov9UnHdc0bnrQa7kYpzA&lf=plcp&playnext=1

      the first 20 seconds are indicative of the fact that I have no clue how to edit!!

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    2. That is even cuter than the original! :)

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    3. omg... it posted the wrong video... AND I have no clue why its replying here... lol. Try this one:

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ti0XYlEElqQ&feature=related

      Skip ahead to 20 sec.

      Delete
  3. As a teenager, The Pretenders song " I'll Stand By You " came out. My best friend and I were convinced that in the chorus, Chrissie Hynde was singing " Take me and do my doggy-style ".


    This, instead of what she actually sang - " Take me in, into your darkest hour ".

    And now you'll never hear that song correctly again!!

    17 years later, and we still call each other when it comes on the radio, singing along with it ridiculously. She asked the DJ to play it at my wedding in 2010, to which we slow danced and laughed hysterically.

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  4. The other day we were headed to preschool and my 3-and-a-half year old son suddenly "sang", "I like big trucks and I cannot lie!". That was apparently all he knew, and I have no idea where he heard the original.

    I'm not sure if you know the hymn "A Mighty Fortress": if not, this next one won't make much sense. My little guy apparently had two conflicting tunes in his head the other day: one was the hymn I just mentioned, the other was Frosty the Snowman. What came out was brilliant: "Frosty the snowman was a jolly happy soul, and armed with cruel hate, on earth is not his equal!" Which I thought was the most amazing plot for a winter horror story, right there.

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  5. OK, two more (there's a lot of music in this house, and when my kids say something that especially tickles me, I write it down), both Peter Paul and Mary this time.
    "If I had a dump truck, I'd drive it in the morning, I'd drive it in the evening, all over this land. I'd drive it out of danger....uh...um....that's all."

    As I was listening to "Kisses Sweeter than Wine", little buddy blows me a kiss and says, "I like this song because it's about kisses." Stops and looks at me for a moment. "And also wine."

    Thought you ladies would appreciate that last one.

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  6. Timbalands "It's too late to Apologize" became "it's too late to call a giant" which to my son, who was 3 at the time, made way more sense. Both my daughter (who was 5 then) and son, sang this loud and proud. I was sad when they realized a couple years later that they had been singing the wrong lyrics, now I never hear my favorite song!

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  7. My five year old daughter has been singing "Joy to the World" and completely butchering it. I've given up trying to correct her. Anyway, she was singing it one day and finished the verse, such as it was, and commented, "I bet most adults would be surprised that I know that song." Yep, I would be.
    Carol

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  8. INXS did a song years ago called Pretty Vegas the lyrics are :
    It ain’t pretty
    After the show


    My son would sing, at the top of his lungs
    "It ain't pretty
    after NACHOES"

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  9. It's not so much funny as deeply unfortunate, but when my two year old would sing the "Dr. Knickerbocker" song from the Little People 'Counting' CD, it sounded like a particularly terrible 'N' word. It went like this: "Dr. N*Bocker likes to dance!" *facepalm*

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  10. This is a great idea. I love when kids gets the words wrong. Here are just a few from my rugrats:

    My 11 yr old insisted that the line "Walking the streets with you and your worn-out jeans" from Taylor Swift's You Belong to Me was actually "Walking the streets with you and your One-eyed jeans."

    My 4 yr old LOVES music and tries to sing along with everything on the radio, on tv, in movies, everything! Currently one of her favorites to sing along to is Pumped up Kicks by Foster the People and she think the chorus is:
    "All the other kids with the pumped up kicks you'd better run, better run, outrun my girl.
    All the other kids with the pumped up kicks you'd better run, better run, faster than my pocket."

    I guess girls and pockets are better than guns and bullets!

    She also loves all things Maroon 5 including the song that inspired this post only she thinks it is called "Moves Ba Jaggah!" (side note: we are from Boston, so the lack of Rs may or may not be intentional!)

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    Replies
    1. LOL, actually I thought it was One Eyed Jeans also. :)

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  11. sung by my 3-year-old (back in the day) with great dramatic gestures and much feeling: "shot through the hark, and you're to blave ... a bad name!"

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    Replies
    1. And we all know "to blave" means "to bluff." At least according to The Princess Bride!

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    2. That's exactly what I was thinking! Too much blaving would give someone a bad name for sure...

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    3. Layne, I seriously almost woke up the baby because I was laughing so hard

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  12. I can't wait to read all of these! I already spit some of my coffee out! hahaaa
    My 3 year old just sings the words she knows REALLY LOUD, and mumbles the rest. "NMNMNNNMMNM I FMMMM SSMMM LIKE YOUUUUUUUUU, I WIS... SMMMMMM BUT.... FOR YOUUUUUUUUUU" (That was Adele btw..)

    OMG i just remembered something funny! When my little sister was a small child, she sang "Tales and olden times, hoody trudy BE! when you need some friends! Lost along the way... beauty and the beast!" hahahahaa

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  13. In Funky Town, when they say "Talk about it, talk about it, talk about mooovin'" my daughter always sings "Taco Bell it, Taco Bell it, Taco Bell fooood".

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  14. My former step twins used to sing "All you need is glove" instead of All You Need Is Love. That's about as funny as it got. But my own little kiddo will probably come up with some gems as soon as he's able to speak so that others can understand him. He already likes to belt out "lyrics" to Muppets songs.

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  15. A few years back, I heard my daughters arguing over song lyrics in the basement. They had been watching Dora's Christmas movie, and they loved singing "Feliz Navidad." The 7-year-old was trying to convince the 3-year-old that the correct lyrics were "from the bottom of my heart," whilst her sister insisted--loudly--that it was "from the bottom of a HO-OO-OLE." The louder you sing, the righter you are, right?? Much funnier that way, and I'll never forget it!

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  16. A friend of mine a long time ago thought that Alanis Morrisette's song "Cross I Bear" was "Cross-Eyed Bear".

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    Replies
    1. Ha! I made the same mistake for YEARS!!!

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  17. My daughter told her teacher her favorite song was "moose like jagger". She also singing pumped up kicks as "all the other kids with the pumped up kicks better run, better run, faster than my brother" (instead of bullet).

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    1. Until I read this post I didnt know it wasnt faster than my brother. :)

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    2. I thought it was "faster than my buggy" until this very moment.

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    3. I had to google the lyrics cause I heard (correctly ) gun and bullet and was hoping I was wrong :P I like brother better LOL

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  18. My recently potty trained 3 year old daughter's favorite song is 'Potty Rock Anthem.'

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    Replies
    1. We are currently teaching my potty-training two year old the fake lyrics to the Vengaboys "We Like to Party"....bathroom version is "We Like to Potty".

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    2. It’s not a song one of my kiddos came up with, but rather one that *I* did (intentionally). While potty training my daughter, I would sing “My girl wants to potty all the time, potty all the time, potty alllllll the ti-ime” (to the Eddie Murphy one-hit wonder from the 80s “Party all the time”).

      I am awesome if I do say so myself. :-)

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  19. While driving a few months back my three year old started dancing and singing along with Lady Gaga. At first it was just a bunch of gibberish, but then came the chorus-
    "Can't eat my, can't eat my, no he can't eat my POPCORN FACE! It is so yummy, yummy!"
    Mommy had to pull over until she could get her laughing under control.

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    Replies
    1. Oh god, can we vote for the winners?!? *wipes tear* That is the BEST visual. ;)

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  20. When I was younger the song Amadeus came out....one day I was in the car with my Aunt who was singing away "Hot Potatoes, Hot Potatoes...."

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  21. Cindy says:

    Here is mine: Yes, I will admit to thinking this when I was 8 years old. Billy Joel's Moving out:

    The actual lyric is "across from the medical center". I heard "across the mad placenta". Yes, at 8 years old I was singing about placentas! To be fair, I probably thought a placenta was a spanish word or something to do with Mister Cacciatore's.

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  22. Pumped up Kicks...... Better run, run faster than my mother

    LMFAO I'm Sexy.... I've got russian in my pants and I'm not afraid to show him.
    This while my 3 boys, strip down to underwear to wiggle wiggle wiggle UH!

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  23. My three year old thinks the Christmas song "Feliz Navidad" is actually "Feliz Mommy mom"

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    Replies
    1. LOL! My son, at age 2, sang this song as "At Least naughty Gus!" Which was hilarious because he was a terrible 2 and his nick name was/is Gus!! lol!

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  24. And I will say.. you destroyed my image of shirtless Adam Levine. He always looked so cute on the The Voice and any other performance with CLOTHES on. Now he looks like drug induced Iggy Pop.

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  25. My toilet-training 2 year old sings "dancing with myself" - for the line: "Well there's nothing to lose, And there's nothing to prove, I'll be dancing with myself" she sings "I'm makin' a poo and I'm makin' a poo and I'm dancing with my se-elf!" I have video footage of it too! Happy to email it on :) yourlifestory@me.com

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  26. My children have problems with The Police lyrics "Message in a bottle" came out "Listen to my bottom" and "I can't stand losing" came out "I can't stand music". And my youngest also misheard the Funkytown lyrics instead of "Talk about it, talk about it, talk about moovin." it was "Taco buddy, taco buddy, taco buddy mooovin." LOL Best entertainment ever!

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  27. R. Kelly's "BUMP & GRIND" was "MONKEY WINE" for the longest time in my house...fine by me!

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  28. There is a song by Lacuna Coil called "Underdog" and it says "You cant kill my soul and kill my dreams" My son thought it said "Kill my soul, Kill my brain"

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  29. About 10 years ago there was a country song where the chorus was "what a beautiful mess I'm in", but my son thought it was "what a beautiful nest I made". Of course you can guess which version stuck in our house.
    Brooke

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  30. Wait...you mean at some point we're supposed to stop singing the wrong lyrics? We often sing "Bathroom on the Right" (Creedence Clearwater). Also, "Hold Me Closer, Tony Danza" (Elton John).

    We routinely bastardize songs just for the fun of it now! LOL!

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    Replies
    1. Absolutely NOT supposed to stop singing the wrong lyrics!! The 9 year old, who is quite the music fan, loves to "sing it like when I was little", and we have fun instructing the 4 year old on the often-more-fun alternate words. For some of the racier ones, I prefer the "bastardized" versions...... ;c)

      PS. **love** that so many mamas are teaching their rugrats the lyrics to Funkytown!! Was the first 45 this older mama ever bought!!!

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    2. Second PS, our favorite Christmas song, "For Unto Us a Child is Born", (which nearly made this never-cries mama burst into tears while pregnant with son #1), has been turned into "For unto us a Chinese boy" by the girl child. So sweet.

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  31. I got playdough in my pants and aint afraid to show it. ( Shes three and thinks that song is hysterical. She sings it to her 4 month old baby brother to get him to calm down. Yes.. parental fail :D )

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  32. My son loves the All American Rejects song "Gives You Hell", but I would always change the channel when it came on. He asked why, and I asked him what he thought it said. His reply: "Mom, the singer hopes the song gives you help-why would you not want that?". We all sing it "Gives you Help" now. Who can argue?

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    Replies
    1. My 3yo loves this song, we change it to "Wish you well" Hahahaha! I like yours better though!

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  33. Although it's an oldie, there was a song called "Two of Hearts", my little sister was convinced the lyrics were "Two Pop-Tarts".

    Not lyrics, but too funny not to share..... My 6 year old daughter thought the group Black Eyed Peas, was "Black Guys Pee". :o)

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    1. OMG - Black Guys Pee.... thanks a lot - there is coffee spit all over my monitor now. Ha, ha, ha!!

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    2. Ruthie Queen Of All Things ProcrastinationJanuary 12, 2012 at 12:32 PM

      LOLOLOL - this HAS to be the first prize winner!!!!!!!!

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    3. OMG! That is HILARIOUS. Black Guys Pee! LOL!

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  34. My daughter heard Akon & Eminem's song "Smack Dat" on the bus on her way home from school one day. Where Eminem says "Tryin to hold a woody back through my drawers" ky daughter tried out a couple of lines she thought it was but finally settled on "Toronto wearing a hoodie doin its chores." It has been my favorite & most embarassing family story to date. :D

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  35. My eldest, at age 2, would sing "Jesus Loves the Little Children" like this: "Red and yellow, black and white, they are such a silly sight!"

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  36. My 2 and a half year old, a big Taylor Swift fan, sings..."someday, I'll be, THEN WE CAN GO SAILING, all your, ever gonna be is meaaan!!!" :)

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  37. For an entire summer my daughter sang "Don't you wish your gopher was free like me"...

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  38. My eight-year-old stepdaughter got and MP3 player from Santa at our house this year so I've heard a lot of chronic lyricosis lately but my favorite was listening to her sing Taylor Swift's Back to December like this: "This is me swallowing my nuts..." Where the heck did she get "nuts" instead of "pride"? They don't even sound similar!

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  39. My son (2 at the time) use to be obsessed with Bruno Mars' Grenade. Sang it EVERYWHERE. Except he sang I'll catch you a cheeeeeeeeeese burger! hahaha

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  40. My second grader asked me the other day if I knew the song, "I'm Stacy and I Know It." A.K.A. "I"m Sexy and I Know It" Her version seems more age appropriate.

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  41. My son thinks Pumped Up Kicks is Funked Up Kicks, but when he actually sings it, it sounds like F*cked Up Kicks. No amount of arguing, begging, bribing or pleading will convince him that A) I'm right, or B) please don't sing that song in public.

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  42. My three year old sings the "can't read my, can't read my" part of Lady Gaga's Poker Face" lyrics as "cherry pie, cherry pie!!!"

    Which really, if you remember that Warrant song and album cover from the 80s, makes this even funnier. We all sing it this way now. :-)

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  43. Nickelback's lyrics: a heart worth breaking
    Son's lyrics (5-6 years ago): a Hogwart's break-in

    He's now 18 and I still tease him about it. : )

    Kristen

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  44. We have sooooo many with three kids who think they know everything, but here are the current inaccuracies making the rounds and igniting many a minivan squabble: '.....and he pooooops like Jagger,' '.....all the other kids with the pumped up shins you better run baby run,' '....I've got fashion in my pants and I ain't afraid to show it (show it show it show it)...'

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  45. I only have my own mistakes. George Harrison's "I've Got My Mind Set on You" was "I'll Have My Mom Sit on You." Also, my parents were dead set against buying me a copy of "Material Girl" when I was a child, and I couldn't understand what they had against sewing.

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  46. This past Christmas I taught my kids 'We Three Kings'...

    Here in Czech Republic, January 6th is 'Day of the Three Kings' and guys wear crowns around town. My 5 year old went on to tell me that on that day he saw the Three Kings of Orientar!! I didn't have the heart to correct him - it was just too cute....

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  47. In church, my 4 yr old sister always sang, "Let the God of my salvation be assaulted (exalted)."

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  48. we attend Mass weekly (which is the worst thing on EARTH according to my 4 year old); anyhow, "Hosana in the Highest" is "Lasagna in the Highest!!!"...pretty funny and, of course, when I make lasagna YOU KNOW my husband and I are going to belt that one out after the dinner prayer! (kids watching and thinking we are the biggest dorks EVER...fine by me!)

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  49. While my kids have had some funny words, they've very rarely had strange song lyrics - unfortunate for me, I suppose. But the best was my now-12-yo at the age of 2:

    Him: Amazing Grapes, how sweet they taste.....
    Me: Taste? Sweetie, its sound.
    Him: Mom, grapes don't HEAR - its FOOD.

    My bad. He would belt out Amazing Grapes at the best times, as well. The best being when some members of our church gathered around a couple getting ready to leave the country on some missions work. The room got very quiet and the pastor was preparing to pray, only to be stopped by AMAZING GRAPES HOW SWEET THEY TASTE at the top of Red's lungs. Giggles erupted, and the pastor said, "Well ... when the spirit moves you" .... and led the group in a verse of Amazing Grapes before prayer.

    PS. He refuses to sing in public now .... there may or may not be some emotional scarring....

    Love,
    The Headmistress

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  50. When mine were younger, there were two songs they consistently butchered. "Sweet jeans are made of piss" by the Eurythmics and Jack and Diane- the chorus- of John Cougar M. "so let it rock, let it row, let the bubba belt come and sink my soul"...then my favorite part- "changes come around real soon make us swim in urine" instead of women and men! Loved it!

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  51. My 3-year old daughter has a very annoying Elmo toy that sings a bunch of different children's songs. She likes to play the "doggie song" (Bingo) and sing along, "There was a farmer had a dog and Bingo was his name-o" (so far so good....) and then YELL along with the chorus, "B-I-M-B-O! B-I-M-B-O! B-I-M-B-O! AND BINGO WAS HIS NAME-O!" Definitely got that on video before trying to correct her.

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  52. "Have some beer and some wine and we'll all feel just fine. It's a small world after all!". Lyrics my hubby taught our eight and three year old that they both now run around belting gleefully at full volume. (After a trip through the Small World ride at Disney.)

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    Replies
    1. Even yesser! Except my hubby & I learned the hard way that there is ABSOLUTELY no beer or wine in the Magic Kingdom park. You have to leave the park & go to one of the hotels or restaurants. Not very MAGIC when you need to avoid losing your schmidt after a whole day there if you're going to stay for the Electric Light Parade. Geez.

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  53. My daughter, then 4, kept asking us to play "Baby on the wall" and we had no clue what she wanted. Until one day The Puddle of Mudd song "Psycho" came on and she started singing along to the chorus, which is supposed to say "Maybe I'm the one, Maybe I'm the one, who is..." instead was "Baby on the wall, baby on the wall..." Poor thing, her older sister still teases her when we hear that song...

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  54. This is not a song lyric but, my three year old proudly tells everyone that her favorite movie is "Cat Food Panda". We have gently explained many times that the movies is actually called "Kung Fu Panda", at which time she looks at us like we are so foolish and says "no, it's Cat Food Panda."

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  55. Pink Floyd Another Brick in the Wall. I was about 7 or 8 when that song was released. You know the end where they say "If you don't eat your meat, you can't have any pudding... " I was thinking, WOW.. what do they have against Jello Pudding? Why so mad? It's chocolate, vanilla, butterscotch... Pink Floyd must really really really like Pudding. Little did I know that pudding = generic dessert term.

    Same album, same age: Comfortably Numb= Comfortably Dumb. Well, that fits doesn't it?

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  56. My 3 year old is obsessed with Adele especially "Set Fire to the Rain". We were in the car the other day and she said, no word of a lie..."Mommy can we listen to Adele? She sounds like magic!" then proceeded to sing, "And I get wired in the rain..." LOL...

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  57. My daughter sings, "All the other kids with the pumped up kicks better run, better run, faster than my Mama!" I refuse to correct her because it's awesomer than the real lyrics, especially since I'm her Mama!

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  58. My daughter, apparently cannot say funk. It comes out f**k. Which was unbeknownst to me until she was singing "We're the renegades of f**k. We're the renegades of f**k" I guess that's not a misinterpretation, but I still told my husband we better not let her listen to "Funk Soul Brother."

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  59. My 11 year old used to sing "Ain't no Harely fat girl" instead of ain't no holla back girl! Lol!

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  60. "Shake it like a corduroy pizza!" (From "Hey ya!" by Outkast) We sing it like that to this day. :-)

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  61. Bon Jovi was playing on the way to school, which I didn't even realize. Collin suddenly asks me, "Mom, what's a 'living donna player?'" At 6:45 am, grumpy mommy usually answers questions that nice mommy doesn't have the patience for. "I have no idea what you're talking about, son." "On the radio. He's singing about having halfway hair and a living donna player. Your music is so dumb."

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  62. Sometimes this mommy loves a little Deff Leopard. My 3 year old belts out "POUR SOME BOOGERS ON MEEEEE, and "I"M HOT,CARSEAT, FROM MY HEAD, TO THE MEAT". Makes me so happy!

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  63. this Christmas, my 1st grader was singing "Deck the halls with lots of folly" :)

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  64. My godparents' son was convinced that in CCR's "Bad Moon Rising" they were saying "There's a bathroom on the right" instead of "there's a bad moon on the rise." He would walk around singing it at the top of his lungs.

    The Coffee Fueled Mama

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    Replies
    1. Ruthie Queen Of All Things ProcrastinationJanuary 12, 2012 at 12:30 PM

      I used to think the same thing! And how about Jimi Hendricks - ...”while I kiss the sky” = “while I kiss this guy"

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    2. There is a whole website for this and it is http://www.kissthisguy.com/

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  65. When my brother was little I was listening to " You Sexy Thing" and he always sang " you suck so bad". Still laugh about this 15 yrs later!

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  66. My then-5-yr-old was singing along with The Beatles' "I've Just Seen a Face" as "Falling, yes I am falling, and she keeps calling me African."

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  67. When my little one was around 3, he thought that the Kids Bop commercial that played little snippets of songs, was one song. So you would hear him sing all of these little bits and pieces of songs all toghether like it was one song. It was always soooo cute! He loves to sing in the shower too now at age 6! Hubs and I will mute the tv and just crack up at what he comes up with. When he was born I started singing "Sweet Child of Mine" by Guns-N-Roses...I know, I know...but he still loves me to sing it to him, and he just calls it his baby song. AND he knows all the words too!

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  68. My daugters's have a compilation CD of some of their fave "non-kid" songs that we play in the car. One of those is the edited version of Gwen Stefani's Hollaback Girl. During the chorus, where the beat is going and she is saying "This my SH**" my oldest belts out (top of her ever loving lungs...."Lost my shoe, lost my shoe.." She finally asked me the other day why she is singing about her shoe. Cracks me up every time!

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  69. When my daughter was little, her radio was set to an easy listening station in Philadelphia. She used to come downstairs singing wacky songs and repeating commercials (Mommy - did you know that if you are the third caller after hearing this song you could win a fabulous vacation to a tropical location? -- she was maybe 4 at the time).
    Her favorite song to sing was 'cheese, cheese, microbeads'. That was pretty much the whole song, over and over. We had no idea what she was singing.
    Until one day, she told us the song was on. It was Cher's 'Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves'. Cheese, Cheese, Microbeads!!

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  70. My 4-year old son was watching Shrek 2 and when the song "Funky Town" was playing, instead of singing "talk about it" he was singing, "taco fatty, taco fatty, taco fatty, taco fatty!"

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  71. When my step daughter was younger she thought that Billy Talent's Red Flag started with the words "calcifer crunch" (cast off the crutch)like it was some kind of cereal.

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  72. David Bowie's "Rebel Rebel" was translated from Hot tramp, I love you so!" To: "Hot shrimp, I love you so!" probably better for a 3 year old anyway.

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  73. For the longest time, I used to think The Steve Miller Band's lyrics "Big old jet air liner"...went "big old Jed and Lionel"! I still can't hear it any other way!

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    Replies
    1. I'm the same way for Guns and Roses Paradise City: "Take me down to THE VERY LAST city, where the grass is green and the girls are pretty"

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  74. I love all the contributions!

    My daughter is the best song-butcher(er) around here. She asked one time for "the song about beans"... turns out she thought Tom Petty was singing, "Friiii-jo-les" instead of "freeee-fallllin'".

    Another time she wanted to hear "the firefly song about the janitor". I was baffled. Her older brother and I figured out that it was the song "Fireflies"... we had to wait till the chorus, and then DD sang out, "I try to make myself believe, the janitorrrr turns slowly" (correct lyric is "planet Earth", but "janitor" is more fun to say!)

    And just last week (while listening to the 80's station), DS asked why Madonna was singing about Cheerios. ??? I cracked up when I figured out that one, "We are living in a CHEERIO world" (instead of MATERIAL world)!

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  75. I just remembered one more
    Jason Mraz's "I'm Yours" the part where the lyrics are "listen to the moment, people dance and sing..." around here it turns into "listen to the music of the Mormon people dance and sing"

    I love it

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  76. Beach Boys "Help Me Rhonda" by my 7 year old:
    "Since you let me down I've got owls poopin in my head."

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  77. Not truly misheard lyrics, but everytime I hear Imma Be by Black Eyed Pees all I envision in my head is all of them dressed up in yellow and black, shaking their hips like they have imaginary stingers attached to them. All I want to do is get up and wiggle and laugh like crazy. I can't listen to that song with a straight face.

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    Replies
    1. My kids thought that the songs was "bumble bee" and walked around singing it that way too. It really sounds like bees buzzing......

      Delete
  78. I wish stories of husbands messing up lyrics counted too. My husband is the master of getting them wrong. My son, however is inheriting this trait. He has a bunch, and can I think of any right now? Of course not. The only one I can think of is when he asked me at about age 5 or so, "Mom, who is John Terry?" I was like, "huh?" and he said, "You know, 'C'mon Eileen, oh I swear what he means...cause John Terry, can do ANYYYY-THING!"

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  79. Also, non-lyric one, but my son used to call "Lorna Doone" cookies "Lord of Dudes". "Mom, can I have some Lord of Dudes?!" WHUCK?

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  80. back in the day, my oldest used to always ask to hear "fudgie bo-bo-la". it took us about a week to figure out she was asking for santana's "oye como va".

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  81. When my nephew was little he thought "Errybody in the club gettin' tipsy" was "Errybody in the club eatin' chips." Pretty stinkin' cute!

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  82. "Pick up my cup, Mama toss!" aka "Fill up my cup, Mazel Tov".

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  83. my 4 year old daughter was (attempting) to sing Country Girl Shake It For Me, of course she only remembers the part about "shake it for the squirrels"....a little concerned i asked her if she knows what that means. she answered, "well YEA mommy, you gotta shake the tree branches so the acorns fall off and the squirrels can eat lunch". Whewww....safe...for at least a couple more years anyway ;)

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  84. My almost 3-year old sing "I got da moose cupcakes, I got da mooooooooose cupcakes." Her current favorite lullabies for her baby sister are "smelly cat, smelly cat, what are feeding yooooou?" and "soft kitty" from the Big Bang Theory. What can I say? I'm a sucker for sitcoms.

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  85. I thought it was "Like a Cheese Stick" for awhile, until I asked my husband for clarification. lol

    My daughter thinks Lady Gaga is singing "Cherry pie, cherry pie" in Pokerface. ("Can't read my, can't read my"). I crack up every time!

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    Replies
    1. So funny - my three year old too! I posted the same thing earlier

      Delete
  86. I have to say that these comments have made me feel like a MUCH better mother! I was mortified that my 5 year old's favorite songs were Moves like Jaggar and Party Rock! NOT ANYMORE HOOKERS!!!

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  87. My daughter is only 11 months old, so she hasn't exactly learned any song lyrics yet. BUT, I do have a good story on my DAD: a few years ago we caught him singing "Return to Simba" instead of "Return to Sender". He learned the song when he was young- way before the Lion King even came out, so no idea who he thought "Simba" was all those years...

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  88. My three year old had two that really stuck:

    "Even Old New York was once New Hampstertown" during They Might Be Giants' Istanbul(not Constantinople)

    and

    "Waving your bladder all over the place" in We Will Rock You.

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  89. During the holiady season, our 5-year-old was singing Christmas carols. He stopped to ask, "Why would anybody want to kiss underneath the middle toe? That's just NAAAASTYYYYY."

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  90. In the radio edit of "Shake That" by Eminem, they drop the "ass" so it goes "shake that (brief pause) for me" and so my middle son, Anthony, would sing "Shake that Anthony, shake that Anthony!". This was when he was 3 or 4. We obviously never corrected him.

    Oh and when Katy Perry chants "TGIF" in "Last Friday Night", somehow he and my 3 year old think she's saying "chi chi, ah ah"

    I have many many more, but I can't remember them all.

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  91. whilst playing RockBand with the neighbors,my 6 year old son proceeded to sing "We Will Rock You"~Queen as "kicking that dreidel all over the place" vs "kicking your can all over the place".The neighbor quickly added "have a little matzah with your burrito!" as we are Mexican.They obviously were learning about "Hermonica" (also an interpretation of his) prior to break.

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  92. My four year old thought "what's my name" by Rihanna said "banana, what's my name, banana, banana, banana" personally makes about the same amount of sense to me as "oh na na." More recently he has started singing "I want a son, I want a baby" we have no idea where this had come from or what it "really is" he said he heard it on the radio in mommys car, believe me that if the Last thing mommy wants so any idea what that song could possibly be??

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  93. My friends daughter sang " I kissed a squirrel" instead of "I kissed a girl", Katy Perry. Thought it was great and didn't require as much as explaining as the other version.

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  94. The only Children's Lyric Fail I have was a wonderful rendition of Avril Lavigne's "Girlfriend". My friend's darling little 6 year old walked around belting out " Oh Yeah! I'm the Mud Loving Princess" which is actually So much better then the actual Lyrics with the swearing in it.

    My favorite "Grown Up" lyrical Fails are "Harlequin Seal" (Our Lips Are Sealed), "The Algebra Has a Devil Put Aside For Me" ("Beelzebub Has a Devil Put Aside For Me" Bohemian Rhapsody), "The Age of Aquariums" (Age of Aquarius), and "Van Halen Is Over Rated" ('That Heaven is Over Rated" Drops of Jupiter). The last two are actually My Own from over the years. ::shame face::

    Jax

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  95. My son will sing along "Momma, Mia, here we go again, mymy my lil sister!" He thinks its a song about his two favorite people, his momma and his baby sister Mia.

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  96. My then three year old would belt out Johnny Cash lyrics. Very sincerely, she would sing "when you get the blues come on, get a ribbon. Get a ribbon When yoooou get the bluuuues!"

    It's rhythm you need to get!

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  97. Christmas has been over for a while, and my 3-year-old is still singing, "GLOOOO-o-o-o-o-ooooooo-o-o-o-o-ooooooo-o-o-o-o-ooooooR-DIA! PeaNUT ChelSEA's DAAAAAAY-OOOOOO!"

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  98. Last year at Christmas my 6 year old neice started singing "Oh Christmas Tree" all by herself in front of the Christmas Tree for all of us to watch her. Her version went like this: "Oh Christmas Tree, Oh Christmas Tree how lovely are your GRANDSONS..." So adorable!!

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  99. Like an earlier commenter said, my kids (4 and 3) are convinced the chorus to Foster the People's song "pumped up kicks" goes: "All the other kids with the pumped up kicks better run better run, faster than their mom." It's too funny to correct them.

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  100. Oh, man. Just also remembered the one that used to totally crack me up: My little brother, when we were teenagers, swore that the chorus of Pepper (by Butthole Surfers - classy!), was not "I don't mind the sun sometimes, the images it shows." Instead, he was sure it was:

    "I don't mind the sun sometimes. Yimmy Jizzit Shows."

    Whaaaat??

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  101. This comes from my younger brother when he was in elementary school and I was in middle school. He though Bon Jovi's "Pour Some Sugar on Me" was "Awesome Cynical Day." WTF? :)

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  102. My girls sing The Teddy Bear's Pinic with the words "...watch them catch their underwear!".

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  103. My daughter thought that Pink's "You and Your Hand Tonight" was "You and Your Hair Tonight." She asked me what that meant, and I told her the guy in the song thought a lot of himself and spent a lot of time fixing his hair.

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  104. My son sings Michael Jackson's Beat It like this:

    "Beat it! Beat it! No one wanna be defeated!
    Show em my monkey!Nah nah nah nah..."

    To that I always reply, "Son, let's not go around showin off your monkey".

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  105. For me, I think David Guetta's, Sexy B... sounds like sexy fish. That song cracks me up :)

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  106. Ruthie Queen Of All Things ProcrastinationJanuary 12, 2012 at 12:38 PM

    My son, at 3 years old, changed Sheryl Crowe’s, “All I wanna do is have some fun” to “bun” & my best friend thought “HIp to Be Square” was “Hit the B-Square” - of course, we always sing these songs as such.

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  107. When I was a kid, I thought Prince's "Little Red Corvette" was "Leave and Come Back". Made perfect sense to me! ;)

    When my father was a little boy, he used to sing "Away in a Manger" at the top of his lungs. However, he used to sing about "the little George Jesus" instead of "the little Lord Jesus"!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I am commenting anonymously to say until a few weeks ago when I saw the song title on my radio in the car I thought it was "Live in Quebec". And I always wondered about everyone's favorite Prince song, Little Red Corvette because I had never heard it.

      Delete
  108. "With a corn cob pipe, and a butt and nose, and two eyes made out of coaaaaaaaal!!!"

    Both of my boys. No convincing them otherwise. He was magic, so clearly he needed a butt.

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  109. This one struck me so funny that I had to pull the car over because I was laughing so hard.

    My 8 yo daughter thought the words to a Katy Perry song was "I kicked a squirrel and I liked it!" and she was quite upset that someone would be so mean!

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  110. We went through a phase of listening to a lot of Schoolhouse Rock.
    I can't hear it now without thinking of the lyrics my son (then age 4) supplied... "Lolly lolly lolly get your badgers here!"

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  111. Apparently he's not Michael Jackson, he's called uncle Jackson. Try as I may, I cannot convince my 3.5 year old of his actual name. We had this conversation this morning while she danced her version of Thriller for me.

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  112. Adele's "Rumor Has I" turned into "Groomer has a cheetah she don't want anymore . . . "

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  113. "Baa, Baa Black Sheep; have you any more? Yes, sir, yes, sir; three bags full; one for my master; one for my date; one for the little boy who lives in the lake."

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  114. My almost 5 y/o sang "up on the housetop reindeer pause, out jumps poodle Santa Clause" this Christmas.

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  115. According to my little sister, Debbie Gibson's 1980's hit was "There's a Zombie in My Dreams!"

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  116. The Doors, not sure the song actual line is "fire in the sky" kids translate as "fire engine guy."
    And Crash Test Dummmies again, not sure the title, actual line "one little, two little, three little idiots" translated as "on little, two little, three little indians."
    I may need to change the music I listen to in their presence.

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  117. My son used to think the Kenny Rogers song Lucille said "You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille...with 400 children and a crop in the field". To this day I still laugh every time I hear it!! His eyes would get super big too when he got to the 400 children part. LOL

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  118. At 3.5 my son would belt out at the top of his lungs "from the mountains, to the prairies, to the oceans, white with BONES!"

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  119. My 6 y/o heard "I like you so much better when your naked" as "I like you so let's have bacon". Dad needs to censor his IPOD playlists!

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  120. In Gwen Stepanie's "Aint no hollar back girl" song, there is a chorus part where she sings "its the shit,its the shit"...but MY daughter always thought it said "miss my shoe, miss my shoe," LOL... you have to LISTEN to the song to see why she thought it said that, you know how sometimes in songs they dont CLEARLY pronounce stuff. It was so cute. :)

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  121. I love the song "Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap" by AC/DC. My son was singing it one day to himself, and as I walked by I heard, "dirty deeds and the thunder cheese".

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  122. My son is almost 3, and he's starting to get creative with the ABC song. Twists include, "H, I, J, K, Elmo peeeeee" and at the end, "Next time you don't sing with me!" (I should add that he's never been a fan of my singing, haha) Also, when he sings "Deep in the Heart of Texas," it's "The stars at night/ are big and strong/ deep in the heart of Texas!"

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  123. My 3 year old son just spent the last 2 months singing "Hark the Herald Angels Sing. Glory to the New Donkey!" That can't be good.

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    Replies
    1. Ruthie Queen Of All Things ProcrastinationJanuary 13, 2012 at 7:23 AM

      OMG - I’ll never be able to sing it the regular way again

      Delete
  124. My four-year old nephew interpreted the line "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes," from "Dynamite," as "I throw up in my hands sometimes!"

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    Replies
    1. This has gotta be the best one!!! Oh I can see the photo to go with this one!!! And I saw something that would make you DO that today too: A guy with dreads and his two year old took one in his mouth and started CHEWING on it!

      Delete
  125. My daughter used to sing Silent Night wrong all the time. Her lyrics:
    Silent Night, Coldy Night
    All is Tall all is white

    It is not as funny as the rest, but we loved hearing this as we live in the midwest....and Christmas time was usually cold and snowy.

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  126. My four year old daughter" I throw my hands up in the air sometimes singing eyo my name is Nemo" actual lyrics "I throw my hands up in the air soemtimes Ayo Gotta let go"

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    Replies
    1. My girls sing "I throw my hands up in the air sometimes saying AO Galileo"

      Delete
  127. Four or five years ago, when Puddle of Mudd's song "Schizophrenic Psycho" was playing on the radio all the time, with the repetitive lyrics, "Maybe I'm the one..." my then 3-year-old son would excitedly announce within the first few notes, "I love this song. It's about a BABY on a WALL." Now, half my town knows it as the baby-on-the-wall song.

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  128. My almost 3 year old's lyrics to Jingle Bells...
    "Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way..Oh my potty is so fun, all the way home HEY!"
    I tried to correct it with the original "oh what fun it is to ride..." and she won't have it. Her's is better she says.

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  129. The song is Pink's Raise Your Glass and my 11 year old sang the line "oh hot damn" as " oh hot ham". Yep. You know you're going to use that phrase now because I sure do!

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  130. My daughter sings Depeche Modes "personal jesus" as "Reach out an touch FACE"

    My son sings "firework" as "they shoot and catch this guy guy guuuuy"

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    Replies
    1. I always thought it was "Reach out and touch face" too until this second. What is it?

      Delete
    2. "Reach out and touch faith"

      Delete
  131. My son thinks the chorus to Journey's "Any Way You Want It" is: "Just because you want it, doesn't mean you need it..."

    so true!

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  132. My son is convinced that Tom Petty's "Free Falling" is "Cuz it's TREE, TREE FALLING".

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  133. When we were little, my dad used to sing songs, but with made-up versions of the words that we didn't realize were made-up! We realized this when my sister was 7, and came home from gymnastics class one night very upset because a girl had been singing "It's my party, I'll cry if I want to". My sister told her, those aren't the right words, it's "I had a lobotomy, I'll cry if I want to"! Of course, all the girls made fun of her!

    We still laugh like insane people whenever we hear that song, now that we know it was actually our dad who was singing it the "wrong" way!

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  134. My son used to sing, "police, mommy, God" instead of "Feliz Navidad." My in-laws still laugh that my husband thought Neil Diamond's song, "Turn on your heart light" was really, "turn on the hall light." Have so many more "mistakes" from my kids and I hate to correct them, because it cracks me up every time!

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  135. Swing low Sweet Cheerios!

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  136. My 3 year old daughter sings the Yo Gabba Gabba song babies wrong. Instead of "babies, babies, remember when we were all babies" her version is "babies, babies, retarded babies." How embarrassing!

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  137. Love me some mondegreens!!!

    There used to be a TV show in Australia (just finished last year after a really long run), Spics n Specs (named after a BeeGee's song) that occasionally had a section on mondegreens: brilliant.

    Cheers,
    Cate

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I was thinking the same thing! I will miss that show! :-)

      Delete
  138. When my daughter was little she sang " Don't you wish your goldfish was hot like me!"

    And more of a mistake of the mouth than thinking if the wrong words- once she was singing Beyonces Halo- supposed to be "baby I can see your Halo" and she belted out "Baby I can see your A- hole!"

    ReplyDelete
  139. Smooth Operator into Smooz Opazata He is 11 now and we all still sing it his way!

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  140. Song Barbie Girl Lyric: C'mon Barbie, let's go party.. My daughter: C'mon Barbie, let's go potty!

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  141. I could write a book with all of my daughter's lyrics... one favorite is 'Juice box hero' aka...Juke Box Hero. But my favorite was for her Church choir a few years ago...at Christmas the tiny ones were singing at Christmas - the correct lyrics were...
    "Hark! Now hear the Angels sing, "a new King born today." That man may live forevermore, because of Christmas day."
    My daughter's version --
    "Ark now ear the angels sing. a new king PORN oh yay! That man will live forever bored, because of Christmas day." Yeah - and as if it wasn't bad enough, I was her Choir director - good times!

    Jen Deming (sorry - I can only post anonymously)

    ReplyDelete
  142. My son says " I'm sixty and I know it!" (sexy and I know it). I have never corrected him. And he thinks "Bottoms up" is a song about changing diapers because that is what I always said to him when he was laying there getting changed.
    Really, there is less guilt about inappropriate music that way.....

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  143. Song:- our lips are sealed.... My Kid lyrics:- ALEX THE SEAL! Hilarious!

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  144. My daughter Alex thought the words to "Get Down Tonight" were: "Do a little dance, smack that duck, get down tonight"....she used to sing it alll the time lol

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  145. My daughter is not old enough to mess up lyrics yet, but growing up my favorite one was for the song "Summer Breeze makes me feel fine..." My friend thought it was "Summer's Eve makes me feel fine...". Everbody laughed and she didn't know why until she got older and found out what Summer's Eve was.

    Another one was the song "Everytime you go away, you take a piece of me with you." She thought "...you take a piece of MEAT with you".

    ReplyDelete
  146. "DJ got us falling in love again"..... my friend (a grown woman, mind you) thought it was "Digi god is falling in love again". I swear to God.

    "Big 'ole jet airliner"... when my husband was a kid he thought it was "bingo Jed had a light on".

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    Replies
    1. I thought it was digi god too for the longest time, even though I knew it had to be something else. LOL

      Delete
  147. I'm a flute teacher, and my son said that he liked it very much when my students played the Christmas song about HIM. I said I didn't think any of the songs were about Simon. He said, "Yeah. There is one. It's "Simon's Night."

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  148. I'm guilty of it and I'm 35. Before my husband corrected me, I thought the lyrics to that same song were, "You've got the moves, Luck Dragon'...you know, Falcor? That big, flying dog thing in The Neverending Story? Yeah, he does have the moves...

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  149. Our three year old spent two weeks begging me to play the Bugs song again on the iPod. I had no idea what she was talking about. Eventually it came up again in the shuffle and she was ecstatic to have found it again! It was Lucy in the Sky With Diamonds. You know, by the Beatles.

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  150. My daughter sings "party rocketship the house tonight" for "Party Rock Anthem." My niece and nephew sing "Uma has it" for "Rumor Has It." I can't get that one out of my head now.

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  151. Both my boys sang, "I got to move my dragon, I got to move my dragon!"

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  152. Garth Brooks: "I'm Shameless"
    Me as a child: "I'm Shavin" at the top of my lungs

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  153. My 3 year old learned "Jingle Bells" and constantly sings "oh what fun it is to ride on a one hor open sleigh".

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  154. my kids are convinced that its "justin Beaver" and its beaver fever. I laugh every time and they just get mad :)

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  155. George Straight: Check Yes or No
    My 5 year old niece: Check gets her no

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  156. My 5 year old daughter sings "Gets you well" for "Gives You Hell" by All-American Rejects. "This is such a nice song, Mommy." sigh.

    ReplyDelete
  157. My 8yo & I sing "like a baby baby baby vooooiiiccceee" for Beaver's Baby after she asked me why everyone hates him. I told her he sings adult songs in a baby voice then this song came on and I changed the lyrics to annoy her. She liked it and sings it that way too.

    Bear necessities, the simple bear necessities
    Forget about your worries and your stripes

    Back in the 80s my sister thought "hush hush keep it down now voices carry" was " hush hush even downtown boys are scary"

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  158. Twelve Days of Christmas: my boyfriend's three-year-old godson sings, "And a cartridge in a pantry!" I die laughing.

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  159. A friend's little brother used to sing "Big ol' Jed had a rhino. . " instead of "Big old jet airliner". But I actually think that's what Steve Miller Band sings if you listen!

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  160. Unfortunately, my kid sings all the lyrics that are totally inappropriate for her. I caught her once when she was 3 walking down the hall in our church singing, "Give you hell, give you hell, give you hell..." over and over again. Oh, yeah, and we are missionaries who were home for a break. I'm pretty sure we lost support over that one.

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  161. "A donkey named Leroy is his friend..."

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  162. Last Christmas I gave you my hug -3 YO DD

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