Friday, April 8, 2011

Top Ten Things You're Not Supposed To Talk About

Recently, I was walking home from school with a big crowd of neighborhood kids and families and I asked my 5 year old son how his day in Kindergarten was.  He was like: "It was great! No warnings!"  I raised an eyebrow and was like: "What do you mean no warnings?"  He did a good job of hiding his initial alarm at having dropped a dime on himself and simply said "I'm sorry. It's just one of those things we're not supposed to talk about it."  So I asked what he meant by that and he told me #10 on this list.  See for yourself.

So I told Kate what happened and she asked her kids and it was just like when I yelled: WHAT'S RULE #1 IN THIS HOUSE?! and they all looked at me like I was speaking Farsi.

Top Ten Things Kids Are Not Supposed to Talk About

10. How long mommy stays in the bathroom.

9. That boogers actually taste awesome.

8. When you talk to Gramma on the phone you're not supposed to say that Mommy thinks her birthday present was ugly.

7. That if you run water in the sink and the shower, you don't hafta really brush your teeth or take a shower. You can play with Bakugans.

6. That thing that happened with the pull-up last night.

5.  Daddy's breath in the morning. Whoa.

4. That I can speak Korean. Yes I can. I totally can. You can't speak Korean so you don't know.

3. Sometimes, when mommy's on her computer you can ask her stuff and she'll just say "mmm hmmm" and then you can play Wii without doing your homework first.

2. That sometimes, the dog has a snack from the litter box and then goes to give Mommy a kiss.

1. [In a whisper] Wieners and nuts.

(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011

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