Wednesday, May 4, 2011

RFM Special Report: News We *Maybe* Missed or Something

So, while we totally were aware that Kate Middleton and Prince William got married on Friday morning, we didn't necessarily include it in the week because we didn't want to make fun of it because it was awesome!

That being said, we decided, after a rigorous noodle lashing by MommyLand, that it was important to acknowledge the event and include it as a Special Report to our news roundup. So, on your mark, get set...

After nearly a decade of dating, Prince William - the heir to the heir to the British throne - married long-time girlfriend Kate Middleton at Westminster Abbey.

Four things we wish to point out:

One, Kate looked stunning in her Alexander McQueen gown. STUNNING. And that she was a commoner and that she got to look at all those super titled snitchy bitches with extra hyphens and the word "of" in their names - like Prunilla Wembly-Waxahatchie Lord Loxley of Hoohahshire - who thought they were going to marry the prince because they were *fancy* and essentially tell them to go suck it. Not that she would actually say that, of course. Because she's a PRINCESS. She just waved at them from her I'm Now A Princess carriage.

Two, Pippa Middleton has set the trend for bridesmaids, in a gorgeous ivory Alexander McQueen dress that makes Kate want to get married all over again again so she can wear it. But still to McLovin. Wanna make that extra super clear. [Editor's Note: Hi honey, know you're reading this...loooooove you.  -Kate]

Three, we sadly have to assume that Princess Beatrice maybe doesn't have mirrors. Or friends. Because that hat? Damn.

And, we know why they say "...and they lived happily ever after." Snort. Yes, we're idiots. We're also possibly fifteen year old boys. We know.'re a Duchess now. You don't have to do that. Anymore. Mind the zipper.

We now return to our regularly scheduled stupidity.

xoxo Kate and Lydia

(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011

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