Saturday, July 23, 2011

The T-Box Challenge: My Box is Better Than Your Box

I like this tastes like my old handbag...
The t-box is about to meet its the past year since Kate and Lydia concocted the brilliant T-Box Taste Test, every store on earth has come up with some form of wine in a box...we're totally waiting for the day when Chuck E. thinks its time to get in on this action. 

There were nine -- NINE -- boxes of wine.  Each box holds between two and four-and-a-half bottles of wine. So we have between 18 and 30 1/2 bottles of wine on the wall. Oh, wait, that's about beers, isn't it? Anyway, there were five of us. Do the math. No really, please, do the math. I have no idea how much that means per person, but Guru Louise has sampled all of them and is now praising the feeling of Kate's carpet on her bare feet. Apparently, it's like butter. Kate is going to find her a pair of shoes. Like, immediately.

We're anticipating a rough night....but this is science, y'all. And there has to be a winner. Can a box from a big box store, or Trader Joe's or somewhere else knock the Target T-Box off its pedestal??

We'll have a complete write up for you on Monday...mostly because the keyboard keeps moving around when Kate is trying to type...but here are the highlights:

There were four whites and five reds, of which we learned three things:
  1. Drink the reds first; they make it easier to tolerate the whites. Most of the whites were used to water Kate's forsythia. Dagney -- who is now a nurse -- will be stopping by to monitor its vitals over the next week, but we imagine the prognosis isn't good. Or, that maybe the plant is an alcoholic.
  2. Choice comments: The pinot grigio was in a really adorably designed box, which prompted Lydia to say, "If I like the package, I usually like the juice inside." To which Dagney said, "I really like a well manicured package." 
  3. At some point, we think Target will give up calling their t-boxes by those pretentious names like *Cabernet Sauvignon* or *Reisling* and just call them what they really are. That being *Purple* and *Light Green* and *Ooh, the Dark Red* which apparently is the class favorite.
Finally...this was Kate's porte cochere before the festivities...and that's Dagney's ass.

And, this is after...

And, this would be Guru Louise....

Kate totally had the guest room cleaned for her...what. a. waste. Yes, she's sleeping on the "driveway"

(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011


  1. Mmmmm black box Cab. My favorite.

  2. OMG you guys are my heros... can't wait for your results post! The pictures remind me very much of "girls nights" we had in University... oh the memories... wine, rum coolers, brownies we ate out of the pan with forks, because no one wanted to bother with plates (which resulted in me throwing out my carpet because after 3 hours of drinking wine and rum coolers we didn't think that brownies STRAIGHT out of the oven would be hot...). Oh good times. thanks for taking me back!

  3. That looks like an amazing time. I wish I could get boxes of wine from Target or Walmart.

    Some of my best memories as a child are the summers out at the cottage when my mother taught us how to get "mommy juice" from the box of wine in the fridge next to our apple juice. I understand the quality of the wine has improved since then. Not that that fact stopped her.

  4. My first official LOL reading your blog. Lots of smirks...but I just can't stop cracking up, especially about the picks. You guys ROCK.

  5. Can't wait for the full report! We love ourselves some boxed wines, too!

  6. I want to be Kate and Lydia when I grow up! I am so starting a t-box taste testing party next summer (once I'm done nursing my youngest). Thank you ladies!

  7. If you're looking for a drinkable box white for these ludicrously hot summer afternoons, check out Big House "Unchained" Chardonnay. It's the only box white I've found that doesn't give me the bad wine shivers.

  8. Louise looks absurdly beautiful considering the fact that she's schnockered in a driveway. What a *pretty* wino.

  9. Could I possibly be looking forward to this recap even more than my new True Blood episode tonight?

    This, indeed, is A Big Deal.

  10. A box of wine keep the classy coming. Love it!


  11. I so wish I could be friends with you ladies! Sounds like you have a great time, every time.

  12. How fun! We can't get booze at Target because Maryland has sucky laws, but I love the idea!


    I saw this on pinterest... seriously... I think you two need this. It will add some extra class to the T-box experience... lol

  14. I'm guessing it's going to be a rough morning for Kate and Lydia after a night reliving college drinking.... Hope the results post includes some funny mommy hangover moments too!

  15. Hmm? I know what these boxes are, I like them. However, I'm thinking that your state sells them in grocery stores? hence, the Target box. Otherwise, I'm really confused. I am a new reader and might have just kept my fingers to myself and kept reading for a little bit longer too.

  16. My favorite is Franzia's "Chillable Red". Finally, an accurate name!

  17. If I only liked Wine. Than again I could have a taste test party based on the pretty bottles of Rum or Vodka... :P

  18. I was at Trader Joe's on Tuesday and I discovered.... T-boxes!! Holy hades, TJ's has wine in boxes! And it's cheap, and good. And good and cheap! I've been in my own little wine euphoria all week.

    It looks like you ladies had a blast of a night! I'd love to hang out with you sometime!




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