Sunday, July 31, 2011

You Answered the RFML BatCall: And It TOTALLY Worked!

First we want to say Thank You Thank You Thank You for all your awesome advice, virtual hugs [Editor's Note: Kate loooooves the virtual hug. Because it's sweet and kind, yes. But mostly because it means you're not actually touching her. -Lydia] and for answering the MommyLand Distress Call from MB earlier this week. As you probably remember, MB's son was a chomper, and the day care was *super understanding* about it, to the degree that they said her 15-month old teething child maybe shouldn't come back to their day care. That's nice.

We also need to say we're super proud of you guys. Kate was all, "let's go to that Day Care and set it on fire and then dance in the parking lot." Kate said that would be equally nice. But Lydia didn't feel like going to jail and, well, we couldn't find a babysitter.

AND, we wanted to share this awesome follow-up letter from MB.

MB here!

OMG - I cannot believe the wonderful responses to my letter!  I wasn't sure of the best way to make sure that all the mommies saw my reply - so I'm sending it via you gals.
Thank you, thank you, thank you wonderful mommies of MommyLand!  Your messages have wiped away the evil twins of guilt and shame and made me 
feel like "one of the gang."

You girls are the best...just please don't hug me.
A quick update - DC will start a new daycare on Monday.  We visited yesterday and loved it.  He walked right in, had snack with the kids, and stayed to play for half-an-hour perfectly happily.  We're going back for a visit this afternoon, too.  The main teacher has been there for 15 years and I loved her right away.  Confident, caring, and highly knowledgeable.

I talked over the biting issues with the teacher and director and they were not even phased.  They have dealt with it before and know how to (and want to!) help DC work through this rough patch.  BTW, he's got 5 teeth coming in right now :(

And, my husband told someone we know at the not-good daycare what happened and the friend's first response was "Huh, I've been hearing some rumblings of problems with that teacher."  His kid is in a different class and has been happy, though.  Fair enough. 

The more my husband and I talked and put together the pieces of what we both had seen over the past couple of weeks, the more it all added up to "get the heck out of there!"  So, expulsion was a blessing in disguise after all.

I just can't say thank you enough for all the love and support.  I am overwhelmed.

Keep your fingers crossed for us!


MB, we love you. Kate even said she could hug you. But, just in case, she still has those matches handy. We're just sayin'.

xoxo Kate and Lydia

(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011


  1. My daycare has a three bite rule. Once they bite three times they are out. And I think it makes sense... if you don't apply it to BABIES. I mean, geez, the kids aren't doing it to be mean, people.

    Anyhow, glad you found a better place for the bambino!

  2. I'm glad you have resolved your problem. I'm also jumping for joy that you have found somewhere you can trust and love taking your lil one. Keep up the great work MB, you're doing well raising your little one!

  3. Glad it all worked out!!

  4. So glad it worked out. I always said I'd rather my kid be the one bitten than the biter. It's HARD to be the parent of a kid that bites. I mean, so e moms get all crazy about their kid getting bitten, but it happens.

    Sadly, I was once the mother of the biter--and the kid was 6 at the time. Old enough to know better. Turns out the other kid had him in a headlock. I told my guy to stomp him on the inside of the foot next time ( doesn't leave a mark) and told the school he was allowed to defend himself and they seemed to get it.

    Long story, long--of they won't work with a biter, dump them like a man who lives with his parents. Plenty other fish out there. Best of luck!

  5. Headmistress YcaJuly 31, 2011 at 8:37 PM

    So very glad this all worked out .... hubby and I were just talking about you this morning. After my 11yo decided to bite my 5yo. *facepalm*

  6. So glad it worked out well for you!! Sounds like the little man already felt at home at the new place and that's always a great thing :) We're all mommies (maybe even a few daddies out there), if we can't support each other when the situation is one of a normal childhood issue, then we should possibly rethink how we deal with others ;) Good luck to your family as you move forward!

  7. I don't like hugs either. The worst is when people find out and make it their personal mission to change my mind.

    Virtual hugs seem like a good compromise.

  8. I worked at a daycare and one of my kiddos was a biter. She was between 1 and 1 1/2 at this time. I got a "chew toy" (not a literal dog chew toy, but a toy she could bite down on) and she kept it around her neck (granted, this would not be a good idea if your child is at a daycare that they don't pay close attention to the children; but at the time I was pretty much a shadow for this child). If she bit, she was told no biting, you can bite this. We also tried to be preventative and if we noticed a high stress situation (she would often bite if someone took a toy, got in her way etc), we helped her to sign "no" or "stop" so she could have something physical to do besides bite. As a last resort if we weren't able to specifically watch just her for a few minutes, we'd put her in a highchair with a few toys and books that she play with for a limited time. Not a time out, and not like she was in trouble; and she didn't mind at all. We also read the books :) As time went on, she did much better and on some days she would actually come into the daycare, or come up in the middle of the day and ask for her biting toy (we kept it in the same spot, and she would get our attention and point at it)
    I hope this new daycare works for you!

  9. Anonymous 8:56. You rock as a day care teacher. The shadowing really works. It's how they deal with biting at my kuddo's school.

  10. I missed this whole thing (How? I have not a clue), but I am SO glad you found a new place and that you are happy. Mommyland is such a wonderful place when we all come together and help each other out, is it not?

    Also - if need be, I'll bring the lighter fluid.

  11. We got kicked out of a daycare because my 9 month old cried. Yes, they kicked out an infant for crying.
    What I want to know is if they hate crying so much, why would they open a child care?




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