Thursday, August 21, 2014
Daddy, My Pillow Smells
The house is dead silent as the two stare at one another for a seeming eternity that lasts all of 5 seconds.
Dad: Excuse me?
J: My pillow smells like K's vagina.
Dad: (meekly) Go to bed.
Dad: Let's go to your room.
J: Smell it.
Dad: (scared shitless and flustered) I don't think that's necessary, just go to bed (he's pleading now).
J: (yelling) I CAN'T SLEEP WITH MY PILLOW SMELLING LIKE VAGINA!
A high pitched, shrieking voice comes out of the darkness. K has awoken.
Dad: (thankfully) Smells like Downy.
Dad: Both of you go to bed right now, and I am telling your mother.
I have a real problem on my hands. My daughter Mini just started Kindergarten and I have a ton of paperwork to fill out for the school. On...
Dear God, I have three kids and today they all went to school, the smallest one for the very first time. You already know that, thoug...
I was taking a late summer swim with Mini recently, when she said something horrifying. I was trying to encourage her to work on her back...
This was originally published 2 years ago, but I'm sharing it again because I figure it never hurts to get schooled by someone drop...
Guru Louise and I asked you about what most teachers really want for end of the year gifts. We got hundreds of answers on Facebook , Tw...
Remember a long time ago when Kate and I went to Chicago and did that thing with Second City? Well I forced coerced kindly asked those ...
NOTE: This post is sponsored by Up and Away , an educational program to remind families of the importance of safe medicine storage, in...
Last week, Mini (my 4 year old) drew this picture. It's apparently a picture of me and her dad at our wedding 16 years ago and we're...
This post is several years old but in honor of the author's birthday, I am re-posting it today. God bless you, sir. You are a fine ...
Welcome to this installment of Horrifying Conversations with Mini, where I'm about to share possibly the most horrifying thing she'...