Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Photos are Hard - Help Me

Ha! I could totally see myself doing this!
I pretty much did this, you guys.
I needed some photos recently for my blogging work and I sort of freaked out about it.  Because - let me be honest, here - I hate having my picture taken. HATE. As in, I'd rather try on bathing suits. I'd rather try on bikinis at Walmart. But I swallowed my fear and begged my friend Kristin (a professional photographer) to help me.

"Please help me look not heinous", I begged. "But also not so much like a grown up that it doesn't look like me anymore. But also not too much like me, because recently I see myself in pictures and I'm like - "Who is that older fat lady? She looks nice. Oh wait. Shit.""

And I really wanted these to be different than a regular portrait because, for the purpose of blogging, I want people who don't know me or have never read my stuff to be like: This woman is obviously insane but I would still hang out with her.

So, that's what I was going for - crazy in a way that is fun, not scary. My pal, the amazing Kristin Merten, totally got it. She also really liked my cat. So she came to my house and took a million pictures of me (but mostly of my cat). Anyway, I narrowed them all  down to these ten pictures but then I got stuck. Can you help me pick the photo I should use for my new profile picture? 

Now, you may be asking yourself - why do nearly all of these pictures that Lydia picked have her cat in them? Here's why: 
  • He is adorable.
  • He distracts from my face. 
  • Sometimes, he even tries to cover up my face for me, which I consider a favor. 
  • Also? When he looks angry it makes me want to laugh out my mouth hole. Because he is so angry but he is also so fluffy. 
 Now I need your help. Can you please select the best picture for me? There's a poll at the end.

#1: My cat wants to murder me, isn't that precious?
 


#2: I look like the hoarding task force just left and they told me I get to keep all my cats.

#3: Barbie was a Fairy and her head popped off.


#4: I honestly didn't realize the sign was upside down. Because I'm awesome.

#5: Slap fight. Cat wins.
  
 #6: He's just petting my face. Because he loves me.

#7: You know that thing where words come out of my mouth? He wants me to stop doing that.
 
#8: Yes. It is a Dora Microphone.
 
#9: Time for a drink. He's pissed he didn't get one.

#10: I'm a respectable hooker. And you can see my whole face. ::shudder::

I would like to ask you separate polls such as (topics suggested by Guru Louise): 
  • Which of these photos makes you want to lock your doors in case I might murder you?
  • Which of these photos makes you think we could be best friends? 
  • Which of these make you think you could be best friends with the cat?
  • Which of these makes you think my cat has the soul of the recently departed dear leader Kim Jong Il?
But honestly, I need an answer to just one question and that is - which one of these is honestly the best for my new blogger profile?
 
Here's how you vote:
 
 
If you would like to caption any of these photos, please feel free to. I would LOVE to see what you come up with. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! 
 
(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2012

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