Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Let Me Start By Saying...

This post is part of the series introducing you to my co-authors of the best-selling book "I Just Want to Pee Alone".

Lydia here. Hi & waving!  Kim said I could write her bio for her, so I am (insert evil laugh).

Kim Bongiorno blogs at Let Me Start By Saying, but is better known for her work as a rodeo clown. She has dated Rick Springfield, Ricky Gervais and Ricardo Montalban, but none of those relationships were satisfactory. She spends a lot of time on FacebookTwitter & Pinterest, mostly trying to contact Ricky Schroder. Eventually she stopped because one night she stumbled onto a Silver Spoons marathon and after twelve hours she was completely sated with Rick. She is extremely attractive and very funny. She enjoys Korean barbeque but only the shortribs. If you try and put lemon in her ice tea SHE WILL CUT YOU. Now please click here to read some posts that she wrote that will completely corroborate everything I just said.*

*All lies.

Kids are born adorable, and come with squeaky-cute voices that make us smile.

Don't let that shit fool you.

They spend most of their days talking trash about us behind our backs, mocking us, or planning things to deliberately mess with our sanity.

Think I'm exaggerating? Then take a look at this quick sampling of what kids are really thinking and saying when we're not listening. 

You may never never look at those sweet faces the same again.

(c)Herding Turtles 2009 - 2013

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