As you know, my four year old daughter Mini is both awesome and horrifying. Here is yet another example of both her ability to be hilarious and my ability to fail as a parent.
Allow me to set the scene. We're eating dinner and Mini asks for a sip of her father's seltzer water. He hands it to her and she takes a big sip and then burps. Then she starts maniacally laughing.
Then everything got weird again.
Mini: BUUUURP. (handing can of seltzer back to her dad) I tricked you!
Cap'n Coupon: (takes it back and begins to take a sip) How did you trick me?
Mini: That fizzy drink had the caffeine in it and I drank it and now I can stay up for dong!
Cap'n: (sprays seltzer out of his nose and sputters) What now? (whimpers) IT BURNS. It really burns.
Me: I'm sorry, you said you'll stay up for dong?
Mini: (nodding) Yah. I meant to say that I will stay up for LONG. Like for a long time. But instead I said I could stay up for dong. Silly me. Saying "stay up for dong" is baby language.
Me: Baby language for WHAT?
Hawk (age 8): That's awesome. What's a dong?
Thumbelina (age 10): I know! It's a clock sound.
Me: That's correct! Dong is a clock sound. No more seltzer for Mini.
Cap'n: (apparently snorting seltzer is an unpleasant experience because he has a really weird look on his face) It still burns. But it's so funny.
Let me pause. By confirming that dong means "a clock noise" I think I have handled this beautifully. I may have thought smugly to myself "NAILED IT." Except that in confirming its definition, I have unknowlingly granted my entire family tacit permission to use the word 'DONG' constantly. Because it sounds awesome and is fun to say! And it means a clock noise!
Mini: Momma, if I finish my dinner can I have dessert and some dong?
Me: Yes, you may have dessert.
Mini: Ok, I'n done. I want dessert.
Me: You are not done.
Mini: Yes I an. Can I have a popsicle?
Me: No. Finish your dinner.
Mini: I AN DONE.
Me: Do not even ask me for dong unless you can finish your turkey burger, young lady.
Cap'n: That's right. Only good eaters get dong.
Me: I need to go in the other room now. I AN DONE.
(c)Herding Turtles 2009 - 2013
Last week I had to bribe my son to swim backstroke. He hates it and as a result, he'd refused to do it since the beginning of this y...
Guru Louise and I asked you about what most teachers really want for end of the year gifts. We got hundreds of answers on Facebook , Tw...
So last summer, my youngest daughter (age 5) began seeing previews for a new Dora show called Dora and Friends: Into the City! Gone was th...
We’ve had a lot of people ask us to write a post about the seemingly innocent topic of the Mother-in-Law. Seriously, people? Are you kidding...
It's winter and its freezing and it's always dark and everyone is sort of sick. So at my house, it is the season of watching too muc...
This post is sponsored by Responsibility.org as part of their #talkearly campaign. School is starting and I’m about to freak out...
I sometimes think I'm the only one who wonders about bizarro things like if the Blue Wiggle is hot in real life* or what the hell happen...
My son has been playing Little League for years. He really likes baseball and even though it can be a major time suck and occasional pai...
Whole30 Day 0: Later this week, I'm starting a diet/nutrition/sadness program called Whole30 . Where you eat nothing but strict Pa...
It seems to me that one of the most important things that no one told me about parenthood is that three is worse than two. Everyone is sort ...