Wednesday, July 10, 2013

What Have You Learned So far This Summer?

I looked at the calendar this morning and realized that the summer is now half over and HOW THE HELL DID THAT HAPPEN?! I may have had a small meltdown. Because I had big plans, you guys. I was going to work with my kids every day on math and reading and handwriting and we weren't going to watch too much TV or play too much Minecraft. We were going to spend meaningful! family! time! We were going to learn all the things! It was going to be so awesome and enriching and fun. 

Except no. Because those workbooks are all still empty and none of the new pencils have even been sharpened. So last night at dinner I asked my kids if they've learned anything this summer. They looked at me like I was insane. Or speaking Hungarian. 

So I asked them again: "what have you learned so far this summer?"

Please add this to the list of questions not to ask your children. Here are some of their responses:

1. "Cake and Bacon. I learned those two things go together. First, they sound awesome when you say them together and second, I bet they taste even awesomer when you eat them together. I also think tomorrow should be cake and bacon day."

2. "Mommy makes reading books not fun. Yes. Because when you tell me to read it is not fun to read, that's why."

3. "Narwhales beat kangaroos any time at all. Really."

4. "Mommy thinks nectarines are dessert. NECTARINES ARE NOT DESSERT, MOMMY."

5. "We are really good at going to the craft store and getting all kinds of creative and learning stuff and then coming home and watching TV."

6. "This is important and I learned it at swim team! HEAR THIS: don't dive in too deep or you will get all scraped up."

7. "When I was watching "Love It or List It" with Meema, I noticed that they never show the really good house that they might want to buy until the very end. That's stupid. They should show that house at the beginning so you know what you're dealing with."

8. "Mommy will say no if you ask for the ice cream from the ice cream truck. Even on special occasions because mommy is mean."

9. "Our great great great grandfather was attacked by beavers. FIERCE AND TERRIFYING BEAVERS. And he had to shoot them because they were going to attack the farm and kidnap the women and children. Wait. Indians, not beavers."

10. "School is actually very dangerous and bad and we should never go back."

(c)Herding Turtles 2009 - 2013


  1. LOL! Yep- We watched Finding Nemo 4 times yesterday. That was a new record. Oh, well.

  2. OMG. Fierce and Terrifying BEAVERS! Wait. Indians. I totally just snotted myself.

  3. I think this all sounds very educational and applicable to real-life.

    Plus, I have "cake n' bacon" stuck in my head now. Thanks kids!

  4. Glad to know I am not the only one with plans that got away from me.... Which reminds me that I need to get back on track today lol

  5. Don't do the educational things. Really. You'll find yourself saying things like "No, seriously, write. Please just write. WHY DID IT TAKE YOU AN HOUR TO WRITE ONE SENTENCE?!" at least 1000 times.

  6. My 7 year old set a goal of reading 70 books this summer (last Summer he read around 50) for the Summer Reading program at his school. I think he gets to go to a pizza party or something if he meets a certain quota. But I've been too lazy to take him to the library two blocks away. I feel like such a failure...

    1. Funniest thing I've read in a long time! People at my office asked if I was o.k. because I was laughing so hard I was crying!!

  7. Love it or List it is EDUCATIONAL tv. I refuse to be told otherwise.

  8. "Wait. Indians, not beavers." That could be your new catchphrase. I, too, snorted when I read that.

  9. I vowed that this summer we would have 2 kids riding bikes without training wheels, the only non-swimmer swimming, and 2 kids tying their own shoelaces.

    I am 0 for 5. Totally stink at summer.

  10. ROFL!!! My kids have only learned what can be found in fictional books...aka nothing ;) Right now I'm mainly focusing on not taking them out in their sleep if they fight one.more.time

  11. Dude. I homeschool. I rock at teaching my kids at home. Yet during the summer I have a giant box of art supplies that have been used exactly once and a bunch of dinosaur workbooks that haven't even been opened. Don't be so hard on yourself. Sucking at summer is really being AWESOME at summer!!!

  12. Cake and bacon is freaking amazing. Esp when made into French Toast Cupcakes.. Search Pinterest, trust me. Soooooo amazing!

  13. The beavers one would be much funnier if I hadn't recently read about how evil beavers are.

  14. At our fourth of July party someone brought bourbon soaked cakeballs with bacon sprinkles.....cake + bacon? Yes please....with alcohol...even yesser!!!

  15. OMG, I feel so much better now!! THANK YOU!

  16. This was a great read, thank you....and you have some awesome followers, too. We need more of THIS than the crap that Hollywood tells us marriage and parenting is.

  17. Yes, on all accounts. I am a public school teacher, and you have managed to summarize my guilt about my own children's lack of summer learning, and simultaneously make me feel okay about it. Needed this.

  18. My kids learned to work BOTH the Roku and the Wii without getting Mommy up too early this, we excelled at mastering emerging technology and fostering independence...Go, me!

  19. #5 is definitely me and yup, I had big plans for my kiddo too this summer, but my own schooling and pregnancy exhaustion has gotten in the way of those plans... in fact pregnancy exhaustion has gotten in the way so much that kiddo tells you how the day is gonna go before it actually happens... mommy is going to go to work, come home and make dinner and then lay on the couch and snooze.

  20. Oh, my God. I heart your kids so hard. Obviously they have an awesome mom which is why they're so awesome.




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