Tuesday, August 20, 2013

11 Things About This Summer

It occurs to me that it's time to tell you guys some stuff that's been going on with me. I know I haven't been writing very much lately. For some reason, every summer turns into this bizarro scenario whereby I can either blog about parenting or actually parent my kids.

Unless I forgo sleep altogether (did that in the summer of 2010, wouldn't recommend it), I just can't write as much as I'd like to. Plus there's all that other stuff - you know - LIFE. It just keeps happening. So here are some of the things that have been going on with me. Some of these things are embarrassing. Others are funny. One is sad.

11. I have a problem with 31 bags. I don't know why I keep ordering them but it's going to become a marital problem if I don't stop soon. I just got one for Guru as her new diaper bag - OMG IT'S SO AWESOME. No wait. Stop. Just... Stop the insanity. I want to buy a coin purse right now. I'm actively trying not buy one. It hurts.

NOTE: Last week, I went to visit my mom and at the same time, Guru went to visit her dad. My mom lives about 30 minutes away from her dad, so I got the chance to give Guru her new baby present IN PERSON and hold her baby and sniff his precious baby head. He is so awesome. And she looks great, even though she hasn't slept in 7 weeks. 

10.  My kids have done basically no learning activities this summer. None. Unless Minecraft counts.

9. My little sister is getting divorced. It is making me FEEL FEELINGS. I don't like these feelings and I want them to stop except that in the past when I've tried really hard not to feel things I tend to make bad choices that are not healthy for me. So currently, I'm feeling all of the feelings and I know this is the right thing to do but I freaking hate it. I wish her mother were here and I miss her.

8. This morning, Mini woke me up at 6:55 am by saying: "Mommy. I'm worried. My arms are really floppy and my hands seem too big and I don't have super strength." The strange thing was, I totally understood where she was coming from. We hugged it out.

7. The whole sweet spot thing? It's still happening. Right now all I want to do is hang out with my kids until the summer ends (which for me is in exactly one week, when I go back to work teaching part time). For the first time ever, I do not want school to start back up. GO AWAY SCHOOL, MORE SUMMER PLEASE.

6. Oh wait. Did I just say that? Because I just screamed at my kids to stop screaming at each other because I am an excellent parent.

5. Every time Mini does not use gentle hands (or feet, or teeth) she loses the iPad for 2 days. She has not used it since July and I think she is currently scheduled to get it back in mid-October.

4. How did I recently spend my 16th wedding anniversary with the world's best and nicest husband, the incomparable Cap'n Coupon? First, Home Depot. Then we went out to a nice dinner where we ate grilled fish and salads. Home by 8:15. Like a couple of ballers.

3. Last week, the littles and I were on vacation and I gained back 3.5 pounds. Worst part? Every time I ate something junky, I felt super sick, like my body was rejecting it. It was so weird. Is this how healthy people feel all the time? Is that why they are so hateful towards things like Big Macs and large fountain Cokes?

2. After a month of my kids singing "We're up all night to get lucky", I had to have a very awkward conversation with my 10 year old daughter about exactly what that meant and could she please not say in public. I've also had to set the radio in my van to the Jesus music station which has had two unfortunate consequences. Number one: worship music of any kind makes me weep uncontrollably and without warning (item #9 is not helping the situation, either). Number two: Mini now knows all the words to the most frequently played songs but will only sing along in a monster voice. This reinforces the devil cupcake theory in a most disconcerting manner.

1. I had this grand plan to completely clean out my kids' rooms, my closet and the craft area - purging unwanted and out-grown stuff. I would do it this month, before school started, so as to have a clean slate! To get a jump on that wily bastard, the seasonal clothing migration! To be organized and on top of things!

It's all right. You can laugh. Wasn't I adorable thinking I could do that? Wasn't I just precious? Because at the moment, I'm not sure the last time my dog ate, where my car keys are or how long that load of pool towels has been sitting in the washing machine. I guess things will get better in this area when school starts up and I have more free time. But right now, I sort of like the chaos the way it is.

(c)Herding Turtles 2009 - 2013

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