But she was having none of it. She kept telling me that when you race backstroke at a swim meet, you could hit your head on the wall (which is of course very true). So she was never going to do that.
I wheedled and wheedled and told her how great she could be and how she could do absolutely anything if she just tried. She gave me a funny look, an appraising look.
She swam over to the wall and grasped it with one hand. She looked at me over shoulder. "I can't do anything," she said.
"Honey you really can you can do anything if you put your mind to it!" I said back to her, while treading water a few feet away. My voice was filled with exuberance and encouragement. "You can do whatever you set you mind to!"
"But not anything," she said.
"Yes anything!" I crowed "Anything at all!"
She shrugged, raised one eyebrow and said: "Not murder."
I began to stammer. "Well no, not... Not murder. I guess we... But we don't -- The thing is...I'm sure you understand the... I want to say that..." Then I just stared at her small face and wondered what the hell was going on.
"So I can't do anything and I can't do backstroke today." And with that she got out of the pool.
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The Force is strong with this one...
ReplyDeleteOh mini. How does she even know what murder is? I wonder if my 7yo knows what it is.
ReplyDeleteYes, they do.
DeleteShe got you on that one. Absolutely genius!
ReplyDeleteOh, my! She's right, though.
ReplyDeleteThat is amazingly horrifying. I mean, way above usual Mini standards. You may need professional help someday!
ReplyDeleteCan Mini please come to my office and speak to my boss?
ReplyDeleteoh my....the things your cupcake comes up with lol
ReplyDeleteI hate when our kids are more clever than we are. So annoying.
ReplyDeleteJust be thankful she's on THAT side of the fence.
ReplyDeleteLove this. Hearing about Mini helps me to feel more normal about my own little Mini and occasional horrifying moments. Not sure if these things are a sign of greatness to come or a sign that we'll be spending a lot of money on therapy some day.
ReplyDeleteOMG - when she is a teenager you will be is sooooo mucccch trouble!
ReplyDeleteI love the way her mind works. She has such an interesting view of things.
ReplyDeleteOMG! I swear my niece is Mini's twin. She is the same age and is just creepy sometimes. She was staring at her Mom's eyes a few months ago. Just nose to nose, straight in to her eyes. She was amazed that she could see her reflection. Then she got really quiet and whispered "I just stole your soul", then skipped away smiling. Every once in a while, we think that she and Mini should meet but who knows what would happen then! :)
ReplyDeleteHoly crap. That is awesome. I just snorted white wine up my nose.
DeleteThis needs to be entered on one of those "The Creepiest Things Your Kid Has Ever Said" sites. That is terrifying!!! LMAO
DeleteShe's got a point, there. Sounds like my daughter. She will argue any point.
ReplyDeleteCrying with laughter!! She certainly told you! BWAH HA HA HA!-The Dose Girls
ReplyDeleteThis reminds me of the English TV series 'Outnumbered'. So funny, but simultaneously HORRIFYING.
ReplyDeleteI can't decide if I like this or the singing Jesus songs in a demon voice more...
ReplyDeleteAlso, the appropriate (or maybe not so much) reaction to this is "why yes Mini, I am quite convinced (no really remember the sharp stick) that if you set your mind to it you could murder. However, my little demon cupcake, that doesn't mean it is something you should do. You should do the backstroke though, it will improve your swimming"
I love the way her mind works. She has such an interesting view of things.
ReplyDelete