tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657Wed, 30 May 2012 15:43:28 +0000Caine's Arcadenickelodeonnewsdinnermoviesbooksbugslawyerswords with friendslexiconshort posttributeshoppingdon't ask your kidst-boxboysprivacyis there a bear in here?awesomenesspollkittensdebateworst momsummerfirst world problemsarts and craftsex filesgirlsnagginglydiawhuck?dadswe're JUST kiddinglettersworkembarrassingrantkidsfacebookhalloweenpregnantsuck it fancyWHATHAVEYOUDONE?stabbyChristmasPinterestbest songs evermclovinmotherpucker projecteavesdroppingangrysleepingCongratulationsleave Mommy aloneinterviewfairytexttroublechurchanniversaryhuffington postyou told ustapEllensickweightFFTIHADcookingmovingother momsresolutionsclusterschmidtpostcardwhuck? grossSGWguiltMILsurrenderbadgerssnitchesmilitarywineoctopusneighborhoodspecial needsGrandMerespybirthdays10 questionsapocalypseChicagopresentstwilightwhucktoddleropen letterLTSshoeschartsHappyWOOThouseworkperspectiveFive Universal Lawsguru louisewhy?musicPajamaJeansgeniusesquizwahmcapni neverenemiesthumbelinajust so wrongtwo year oldawardsround upbest everbest. idea. ever.BWTrewindgrocery shoppinghawkLeftycaption contestpicturesbabblehormonesMIniangry rantwhacktacularfunnyhot as ballsthe forcevacationsYentazombiesthanksgivingworking momcelebrity advicebedtimefive thingsexpertsCap'nstepmomstupiditydeployedpoolhelp this womanlaundryerrandsconversationshookersOffspring #1tipsAunt Maryspringsportstextsprofessionalgive-awayjillianJerseydanceThe Fonzhusbandsvanitytop ten moreTVadvicelostwhackdogsdivorcesparkpeopleexperimentsschoolbeesscarymoviebrazilianMcGeejackholebabyspiesmaking listsmaternal ammunitioncelebrationsummm what?Eastertop ten listcatgaze anatomyPMSruleswinnermonkeysdomestic enemiescrosswordqueensbeachhomeschoolconfessionalpuppiesmarriageMAUDEwintercrazyhelpshut upprimersgw.kateBRAND NEW BITCHEStrue bloodcelebritiesclothesmad menNew Yearsdrivingfive questionsoverheardsquirrelsgrossfriendsxy ratedbirthdayboobsoldguestpostdos and don'tswhere's the corkscrew?again-istanvampirestargetclogvalentines daysingle momtoysteenagersfoodsquare upIHPsMDR wordsvotefaildoucheleavesFor the Love of God, Let Me Pee Alone: the not-so-joyous parts of motherhoodhttp://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/noreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)Blogger853125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-8731469831437994385Tue, 29 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-29T00:00:07.006-04:00presentshelp this womanadvicesummer Hi and waving! It's Lydia and Louise! Did you have a good Memorial Day weekend?! We missed you! [[[awkwardly long internet hug]]] So we need your advice because we are very confused about something important. It's almost the end of the school year and it's time to buy presents for our kids' teachers. We love our teachers and we want to do something nice for them but at the same time, we http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/help-this-woman-what-do-i-get-teacher.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)118tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-1845260631173392486Sun, 27 May 2012 21:55:00 +00002012-05-27T17:56:00.636-04:00Only the best video ever that will make you cry tears of HAPPY, HAPPY JOYFULNESS. Yes. That actually happened. Well done, Isaac. You're a wonderful persona and a total romantic bad ass. xo, Lydia (c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/happiest-and-best-youtube-video-eber.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)31tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-5590939078259361439Wed, 23 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-23T00:00:00.412-04:00lydiadogsgross If you have a weak stomach, or have a bad reaction to things that are disgusting (particularly in relationship to dogs and canine behavior), THIS IS NOT THE POST FOR YOU. You should probably click away. Because it's about to get all kinds of nasty up in here. Here's the thing about having a dog. It's gross. Having kids is gross too, of course, what with the being puked on and never knowing http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/most-disgusting-thing-that-has-ever.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)107tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6182312044443952332Tue, 22 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-22T00:00:01.582-04:00motherpucker projectPlease note that Kate is wearing Jimmy Choos. Also note that Lydia is wearing clogs. This was not planned.The only thing missing here is Guru Louise (cue the sound of stifled sobbing). As you know, we wrapped up our Mother Pucker Mother's Day project by making 100 gift bags for every mom in every homeless and domestic violence shelter in our community. It was so awesome. Imagine a perfect, sunny http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/mother-pucker-stuffing-party-wrap-up.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)10tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-3839959755656116900Thu, 17 May 2012 13:44:00 +00002012-05-17T09:44:34.832-04:00 We wanted to share some of the amazing emails and stories we've gotten as a result of the Mother's Pucker project. Here goes: ---------------------------------------------------------- I just wanted to take the time to thank you for your Mother Pucker project! When I read the blog entry about taking Mothers day back it really upset me... I was all teary and bleary thinking about all http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/stories-from-mothers-day.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-7651141484736357121Wed, 16 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-16T08:12:51.369-04:00best. idea. ever.working momAs you all know, a few months ago I went back to work part-time. I’m lucky enough to have my amazing MIL watching my kids one day a week and on the other day I hired a babysitter.This was my first time hiring a regular caregiver for my kids and I found the whole process really intimidating and annoying. We’ve had plenty of date night babysitters in the last four years, but they had all been http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/mommyland-babysitter-application.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Guru Louise)45tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-2630474373435057128Tue, 15 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-15T00:00:01.905-04:00kidsMIniconversationsMy daughter Mini is three years old and is a precious little cupcake baked by the devil. Here are some of the conversations I’ve had with her lately. Including questions. Questions that no sane person can answer.Mini: You know Mr. Jones who lives in da house right dere?Me: Yes.Mini: Why does he look like a person?Me: Because he is a person.Mini: I'm skeptical.Me: ??Mini: I am.Me: ??Mini: BUT WHYhttp://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/conversations-with-three-year-old.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)44tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-1764856860331610919Sun, 13 May 2012 01:02:00 +00002012-05-12T21:26:49.303-04:00motherpucker projectHappy Mother’s Day!No, really, I mean it. This is a truly happy Mother’s Day thanks to the generosity and sheer kindness of all of our Mommyland Mother Pucker helpers. We took all that commercialized, superficial, hyped-up Mother’s Day bullschmidt and we kicked it right in the crotch, like Ralph Macchio doing a crane kick to Johnny’s nuts.Thanks to you, we helped hundreds of Mommyland moms feel http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/i-carry-your-heart.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Guru Louise)29tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-8470680136896752146Thu, 10 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-10T09:37:07.631-04:00motherpucker projectlydiaembarrassing Guess what? I have some good news. In fact I have TWO bits of good news and a story where I humiliate myself in public because my 3 year old is cupcake baked by the devil. Ready? Here we go! I heard from Yvonne at World Birth Aid. Her organization has received almost $2,000 in donations in the past 10 days. SERIOUSLY? That's 1,000 clean birth kits. That's potentially hundreds of momma and http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/little-puckdate.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)47tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-5694119806500150675Wed, 09 May 2012 12:37:00 +00002012-05-09T08:37:04.254-04:00motherpucker projectawesomenessletters When I started writing this, I had titled it "Our Stories...The Givers" and then McLovin walked by and said something about givers and who are the receivers and then I started to explain that I meant they were letters from the moms who had given stuff to other moms but he had that face on that meant that he was being funny and porny and then I changed the title something to reflect even more http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/we-totally-puck.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Kate M.)20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-4823559297275621473Tue, 08 May 2012 20:28:00 +00002012-05-08T16:28:36.075-04:00 Here is something else I don't want. I posted the graphic below last week when I introduced the Mother Pucker project, then people started emailing it to me ("Did you see this Lydia? It's so YOU.") and sharing it on Facebook and Twitter. And I was like, OH SNAP. I finally do something halfway decent and our name isn't even on it. Typical. So I just put our name on it. Because this table is http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/whats-wrong-with-mothers-day-in-table.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6366396990536755240Tue, 08 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-10T09:02:31.638-04:00 So as one part of the Mother Pucker project to reclaim Mother's Day winds down, another is getting us all wound up. The wind down? Last night we finished matching up the last mommas to help each other this Mother's Day. We matched over 400 women who wanted to help, with moms who need a little extra love this. We're already getting stories about people being so awesome to each other that it http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/mother-pucker-stuffing-party.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-829269582591802779Mon, 07 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-07T00:00:07.683-04:00Yentaadvicecooking<!--[if !mso]> v\:* {behavior:url(#default#VML);} o\:* {behavior:url(#default#VML);} w\:* {behavior:url(#default#VML);} .shape {behavior:url(#default#VML);} <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false false EN-US X-NONE X-NONE http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/yenta-takes-on-eggplant.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6623719732985226166Thu, 03 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-03T00:00:02.487-04:00motherpucker projectOn Tuesday we introduced y'all to our Mother Pucker Project. Can we just take a moment to say that you guys are flippin' AWESOME?! We've already received hundreds of emails from moms asking to help other moms...moms saying they received help in December from a Helping Hooker and now they are in a better place and can help someone else...moms who have generously donated to World Birth Aid...and myhttp://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/mother-pucker-swag-baby.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Guru Louise)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-807691237372105166Tue, 01 May 2012 04:01:00 +00002012-05-10T09:02:03.722-04:00motherpucker project Here's the thing about Mother's Day: there's something wrong with it. I've always felt like Mother's Day was sort of a disappointment. I'm not whining about a lack of jewelry or some crap like that. Because sometimes I think the general impression (in the media and elsewhere) of what moms want for mother's day is kind of bullschmidt. Here's what I mean (and Zales, I'm looking at you): http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/these-hookers-are-taking-mothers-day.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)59tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-3868602086413769480Tue, 01 May 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-05-01T00:04:57.830-04:00motherpucker project We're in the process of reclaiming Mother's Day through being completely awesome to each other. It's called The Mother Pucker Project. So when we got an email from a blogger named Adriel who asked us if we'd participate in something called "Bloggers for Birth Kits", we were like "YES. ON IT". Because it is an amazing project. We cribbed most of the following from her website and she was totallyhttp://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/05/whats-clean-birth-kit.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)45tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-2567266367543400981Thu, 26 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-28T16:48:53.455-04:00scarynewsfriendsEllen Today? Happy kitten. After a week of crappy news in Mommyland, which followed an even crappier week of deep, contemplative thoughts that made our brains and hearts hurt... It's f*cking time for some good news. Here's a little story like to hear it here it goes: Once upon a time there was a really great family. In this family there was a mom, a dad, and three beautiful little girls. What this http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/and-finally-some-freaking-good-news.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)47tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-4225070740897082536Wed, 25 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-25T00:00:13.175-04:00katekittensPinterest          I am currently a sad kitten. I am sad. Kate is gone. It's my fault, too. I told her she had to tell me what she was doing. And she did. And now she's gone. She'd sort of been gone already because of her selfish need to prioritize things like parenting her children and real life responsibilities and whatnot over blogging with me, but now it's official and I feel like a piece of stool.http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/so-now-what.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-8127816514020679687Tue, 24 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-24T00:00:16.511-04:00katestupidityHi girls... So, as you maybe could tell for the past few days weeks months [Months? - Kate] [Yes, stupid. MONTHS. Gah. - Lydia] my attendance here in MommyLand has been a *little bit* non-existent. In the way that Lydia says that I have a *little bit* of an interest in shoes.  We know we've told you so many times that things were getting busy -- oh that sounded porny didn't it? -- and that it washttp://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/doctor-kate-is-inand-also-out.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Kate M.)39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-7554257218876617585Thu, 12 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-12T00:00:06.089-04:00kidsbirthdaysFive Universal LawsWhy do kid's birthdays always seem to degenerate into a giant cluster of stress, disappointment, exhaustion and not enough juice boxes? Seriously. I want to know. You see, I'm doing my very best not to raise bratty, over-entitled children. We give them each three presents at Christmas. THREE. We discuss with them how much things cost and what is reasonable. We talk a lot about gratitude and http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/5-universal-laws-of-kids-birthdays.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia and Kate)34tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-5450606936299507141Wed, 11 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-11T00:00:04.463-04:00awesomenessCaine's Arcademovie This is Caine in his office. Photo is from www.cainesarcade.com Sometimes you come across stuff on the internet and you just really have to share it. This is one of those things. Please meet 9 year-old Caine Monroy. Caine lives in East Los Angeles with his family. He spent his summer vacation last year building an elaborate arcade in the store front of his dad's junk yard and used auto parts http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/best-10-minutes-on-internet-caines.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-9076261956202524622Tue, 10 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-10T09:06:14.232-04:00whuck? grossguru louiseHow was your holiday weekend? Good? Let me tell you who did NOT begin her Easter on the right foot: my friend, Amy. Note: Before we discuss this any further, let me just tell you that this may get a little disgusting. But if you've dealt with small children it's pretty much par for the course. Amy had a really extra special weekend planned. Besides having two small children at Easter (which, http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/self-timer-incident.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Guru Louise)39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-498602006261140855Sat, 07 Apr 2012 21:01:00 +00002012-04-07T17:02:06.667-04:00puppiesEastermovieHappy Easter! Please enjoy some cuteness. xo, Lydia, Kate & Gurur Louise (c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/happy-easter.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-3735256434342412484Thu, 05 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-05T09:08:53.702-04:00lydiawhuck?TVstupidityI sometimes think I'm the only one who wonders about bizarro things like if the Blue Wiggle is hot in real life* or what the hell happened to the redheaded girl from the Fresh Beat Band? Do you ever wonder about things like that, too? Please say yes. Obviously, I have young kids and we watch TV and I have no life. Don't judge me. Recently I noticed that a bunch of kids shows that I haven't seenhttp://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/is-it-just-me-i-want-backstory-on-kids.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)265tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6037094990518005863Wed, 04 Apr 2012 04:00:00 +00002012-04-04T09:39:15.346-04:00teenagersdadsstupidity YES! It could happen! My daughter is almost 9 and thankfully she's still not that into boys. But some of her friends are. Some of them are starting to have crushes. It is making me insane. I swear about 5 minutes ago they were all playing Polly Pockets and asking for juice boxes. I WANT THAT BACK. So my husband, the incomparable Cap'n Coupon, and I discussed the future and the fact that some http://www.rantsfrommommyland.com/2012/04/5-dating-sites-my-daughter-will-be.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Lydia B.)64