tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37448579650377456572012-02-10T14:25:55.591-05:00For the Love of God, Let Me Pee Alone: the not-so-joyous parts of motherhoodKate and Lydiahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02826736696950400117noreply@blogger.comBlogger8021100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-78868858040575046092012-02-10T00:00:00.006-05:002012-02-10T08:46:14.917-05:00

Remember how I made a video of all the toys that my precious little cupcake named things like Lionsack and Crack Rabbit and Horny? Then I asked you guys to please tell me if your kids did it, too? We got over 200 comments. And they were all hilarious. THANK YOU. I asked all our buds for help - Guru Louise, Kate, Ellen, The Yenta, The Pregnant Chicken, Mom in a Million and Stark.Raving.Mad.Mommy.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-22772882195809271142012-02-08T00:00:00.004-05:002012-02-08T12:39:31.050-05:00

Valentine's Day is right around the corner. And that holiday, like Mother's Day, has a tendency to disappoint. So I want to try something. In the past, we’ve run a bunch of advice columns called Help This Woman. It’s not ever me giving the advice, because I am a moron. Moms write to MommyLand with a problem, and I have no idea what to say so I ask you. And you respond with your advice by leaving

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com364tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-40779519879810757472012-02-07T00:00:00.012-05:002012-02-07T08:47:01.933-05:00

You guys all know about Words with Friends, right? It's basically on-line Scrabble that you can play on your phone or computer or through Facebook. And it's both wonderful and horribly, horriby stupid and bad. I don’t actually hate Words with Friends. It’s just that I’m totally addicted to it and it’s eating my brain. It got so bad with Kate that she had to quit cold turkey. Which is actually

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com50tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-10318498131929777452012-02-03T00:00:00.001-05:002012-02-03T08:29:54.432-05:00

As usual, just when I think I'm sort of funny or good at blogging - you guys leave me comments that have me howling with laughter and changing m'britches.Example: I run a little movie about the bizarre and inappropriate things that my 3 year old names her toys and you guys leave comments like this:My three year-old son called his newborn baby sister Phallus for a few weeks. As in "Mommy, Phallus

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com207tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-53242617776522268852012-02-01T00:00:00.003-05:002012-02-01T08:39:54.177-05:00

Lydia here. I made a little movie for you about my precious little cupcake of a three year old.As many of you may already know, my youngest child is pretty awesome. She gets into scrapes and makes messes and climbs like a monkey and does other naughty things. I also knew that when she turned three, that she could prove my theory that 3 is worse than 2 beyond any reasonable doubt.But I know that

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com145tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-67834091996564157582012-01-31T00:00:00.000-05:002012-01-31T00:00:01.691-05:00

<!--[if gte mso 9]> 72 544x376 <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-US X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com58tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-31078359663401479862012-01-26T00:00:00.001-05:002012-01-26T00:00:04.645-05:00

This week's very exciting round-up includes cookies! And Star Wars! And loads of videos! Can?! You?! Feel?! The?! Excitement?!Have you ever dealt with the 5 Minute Car Nap? It sucks balls. One of our gorgeous and talented RFML mommies sent us this video of her doing everything within her power to keep her toddler from falling asleep in the car and we thought it was awesome, so we wrote about it.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com32tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-74223699644907950082012-01-25T00:00:00.000-05:002012-01-25T00:00:02.066-05:00

I moved last fall. It was awful. That being said, I love our new house and I feel so lucky to be here. I wake up every day with this feeling of lightness and relief because the move is over. It was sort of like Jr. High School - I don't regret doing it and I know it was an important rite of passage that helped get me where I was supposed to be. But I hated every f*cking minute of it. And like

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com35tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-13025571047665222982012-01-24T00:00:00.003-05:002012-01-24T07:58:16.634-05:00

Hi everyone! It's me, Guru Louise. How are you? My kids have been adorable but disgusting lately, so Kate & Lydia let me write about it. I think we can all attest to the amazing power children possess to completely defy embarrassment. They seem to have no shame about, well, anything. Recently I’ve witnessed my children in cringe-worthy situations and instead of looking sheepish they look like

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com42tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-25185336210713295972012-01-23T00:00:00.003-05:002012-01-23T00:00:01.526-05:00

Grandpa is getting me a pony! Today's post comes from our friend Rob. You might remember him as the dad who gets annoyed when old ladies ask him if he's babysitting and he's all: "I'm not babysitting. SHE'S MY KID." A little more about him: Rob Kristoff was educated as a Pastor, licensed as a teacher, but works as a freelance writer.  But in reality he spends most of his time with his

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com53tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-34449752198241508072012-01-20T00:00:00.003-05:002012-01-20T00:00:05.844-05:00

I love my kids so much but I swear to Maude, I have to tell them the same schmidt about twenty times a day and I'm about to freak the freak out. Would you like an example? Here we go. I don't want to say "Please pick up your coats and shoes" anymore. In fact, if I say it again - my right eyeball will start throbbing and then it will explode. But if I don't say those words then every, single time

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com311tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-19608214074372846942012-01-19T00:00:00.018-05:002012-01-19T08:54:07.012-05:00

So today I want to share some stuff with you guys. First, a couple of posts I wrote for Babble: People whose in-laws are obviously insane gave them presents and we get to laugh at them. Disgusting GOOP that has to do with bathtubs but thankfully nothing at all to do with Gwyneth Paltrow. Women complain about men and then it turns out everyone is pretty much equally assholic. My kids are

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-34813789445754149992012-01-18T00:00:00.006-05:002012-01-18T00:00:00.651-05:00

Dearest fabulous RFML readers,  What a warm welcome! I’m thrilled to be part of the Mommyland family- and promise to live up to all of the expectations you have of a good Yenta... Big hair, big boobs, big mouth.  Since you can’t see me, you’ll have to take my word that I do indeed possess all three qualifications.  Like Lydia mentioned we go way back to high school cheerleading, and I’m pretty

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com34tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-58816720903188220722012-01-17T00:00:00.003-05:002012-01-17T00:07:52.259-05:00

Last week, after hearing her son sing a heartwarming rendition of "Boobs like Jagger", Lydia asked you to send us the funniest song lyrics your kids ever got wrong and they were so awesome. Being indecisive and not wanting to play favorites, we asked our buddies Guru Louise, Mom in a Million, Stark.Raving.Mad.Mommy and the international superstar Pregnant Chicken (she's from Canada) to help us.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com64tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6884771191124789112012-01-12T00:00:00.000-05:002012-01-12T00:00:08.139-05:00

Last night, my 6 yr old son Hawk & I got in a fight. Apparently, it's perfectly fine to say "boobs" because why else would it be in the song that EVERYONE knows? "What song?" I asked. He gave me a patronizing stare, sighed and said:"Boobs Like Jaggar." He then walked away, shaking his head. I love being patronized by a first grader. So I posted it on Facebook. And the mommies on our FB

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com237tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-76969900883154039352012-01-11T00:00:00.002-05:002012-01-12T21:17:09.118-05:00

It's winter and its freezing and it's always dark and everyone is sort of sick. So at my house, it is the season of watching too much TV. This year, I'm determined to watch great movies with my kids instead of the exact same ones over and over again until I want to curl up and rock in the corner. So a couple of weeks ago, I asked you guys on Facebook to suggest your very favorite off the beaten

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com182tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-21680376421598250582012-01-10T00:00:00.001-05:002012-01-10T08:32:25.697-05:00

By now you all know that I'm food obsessed in the manner of a young Labrador. But let me clarify that statement, because this is important. I'm focused on food because I love it but mostly because I'm responsible for feeding five people every day several times a day. I have to be thinking about my next meal because half the time, it must be approached with a level of strategery that even an

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com57tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-39774936069952792492012-01-09T00:00:00.009-05:002012-01-09T00:00:02.187-05:00

Guru Louise sent us this last night and reminded us why we love her so much. ------------------------------------------------------------------ When I checked-in with the news on Sunday morning I was immediately assaulted with the information that Beyoncé! Had! Her! Baby! I love me some Beyoncé (and will perform the Single Ladies dance in its entirety upon request) but I’ve had some mixed

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com36tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-29343823497442300142012-01-05T00:00:00.000-05:002012-01-05T00:00:03.754-05:00

This is a little quiz. Kate and I are very open about the fact that we suck at parenting and wish that we could be better at it. We also wish we could be less annoying. You know what we mean when we talk about being THAT mom, right? The one you always see in the grocery store? Or whose kid is on the same soccer team? Well for every one of these questions, one of us (sometimes both) have

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com67tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-51042553913302175632012-01-04T08:45:00.000-05:002012-01-04T08:57:13.471-05:00

I've been meaning to tell you this story for ages. I know how much you all enjoy reading about me doing something stupid. I like this story for several reasons: 1) I demonstrate how weird I am. 2) The Cap'n says something fairly straightforward but does so in such a manner as to trigger an episode of Raging B. 3) It shows how there are moments when men and women barely speak the same language.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-67005790120916481662012-01-03T00:00:00.001-05:002012-01-03T00:00:02.814-05:00

If you're a New Year's Resolution kind of person, and even a teensy bit like Kate, you'll be the kind of woman who goes way too grandiose when it comes to all the changes you will be making [awww crap] two days ago. And then after a couple days of abject failure and self-loathing, you'll come to the conclusion that New Year's resolutions -- as our children so painfully pointed out for us

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com27tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-17416729496515183392012-01-02T00:00:00.002-05:002012-01-02T00:00:08.318-05:00

Last week I made the mistake of asking about my young children about New Years Resolutions. Specifically, what mine should be. It was sort of like that time when I asked them "What's rule #1?" or "What has mommy taught you?" and their answers made me want to chortle and then cry. That's right - It made me want to want to chortlecry.So I told Kate and Guru Luise to please ask their kids to see if

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-87833525817022042112011-12-30T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-30T01:01:57.120-05:00

Liddy,I don't think you should be so upset about turning forty. After all, some really amazing women are forty. Like me and Maude. And, she has a face and I have hair, so that really is all that needs to be said about that.You have a husband that loves you and pays for stuff and allows you to be friends with me and walks upright. And three children that I'm still not sure how your vagina made

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com30tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-19084459799853043692011-12-28T00:00:00.000-05:002011-12-28T00:00:05.953-05:00

Kate, Guru Louise and I have read this first story about 14 times and I still cry ever time. It just makes my heart want to bust out of my already substantial cleavage. It also makes me brave enough to admit something to you hookers.During this whole experiment, every time I sent an email matching hookers up (and I sent about a million of them), I said a prayer. You don't have to believe in God

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-73550195611574281432011-12-27T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-27T00:00:06.906-05:00

<!--[if gte mso 9]> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-US X-NONE X-NONE <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]>

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-56882083695787790592011-12-26T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-26T00:00:00.907-05:00

As promised, we've read every word of every sentence of Your Stories. And we have kept Ma Bell busy with our calling each other and crying over the phone and seriously there's not enough Kleenex in the house for all this excess facial watering. And now, we're sharing your stories...Aunt Mary, in her infinite, awesome Aunt Mary wisdom, wrote us the other day and said we needed a bigger picture and

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-54399335772644521852011-12-23T00:00:00.002-05:002011-12-23T00:00:01.525-05:00

I had a plan. And a list. And, hello, lists are non-negotiable. So I'm still wondering how I wound up with $535 dollars worth of unnecessary extraneous crap-McLovin-is-gonna-kill-me awesome stuff from Target. [Editor's Note: This was actually her entire holiday shopping. As much as it killed her to do it all at the last minute, she sort of had to because of her swanky new job and also a certain

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com115tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-31687661785209063282011-12-22T00:00:00.000-05:002011-12-22T00:00:01.646-05:00

Today's post comes from our dear friend, Mrs. Darling. She has contributed many wonderful posts over time and this one is about how much fun it is to get the flu right before Christmas...--------------------------------------------------------------<!--[if gte mso 9]> <![endif]--><!--[if gte mso 9]> Normal 0 false false false EN-US X-NONE

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-13196342353395846472011-12-21T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-21T00:00:11.686-05:00

So, Kate is sort of slow to catch on to this. Last year, Lydia went on and on about some elf that sat in her house, and that she and the Cap;n would wig out every morning about the elf and who moved the elf and where is the elf and  -- wow -- they really simultaneously hated and were really, really concerned about this elf. It turns out that people buy this small toy boy and move him around the

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-17115325640997259602011-12-20T00:08:00.000-05:002011-12-20T07:49:04.576-05:00

Our awesome friend Lainey wrote this post for us and we love it so much we want to marry it. And we fell pretty much the exact same way she does about the gender-specifics of toys.Lainey is a stay-at-home mom to 3. Word Girl is almost 8, Princess Pouty is 5 and Evel Knievel is 3. You can check out her blog right here.------------------------------------------So my son wants a Thumbelina laptop

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com102tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-44663047429722274222011-12-19T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-19T00:00:03.573-05:00

Hello hookers!We want to thank all of you so much for participating in the Grand Hooker Experiment with us. The project is finally shut down and everyone who asked for help is now matched. We are so overwhelmed and grateful to all of you.Other than returning a couple of last emails - we are officially done.So thank you from the bottom of our hearts. And we made you a little video so we could (

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com60tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-31849167171098605862011-12-15T12:30:00.000-05:002011-12-15T23:52:03.123-05:00

(This is a re-run from last year, but we still love it so...)It's that time of year again, when we receive holiday greetings from loved ones near and far. Those that are organized can be identified by the fact that their Christmas cards are already stamped, sealed and off in the mail. Other people, like me, use the time they should be spending getting their cards ready and instead scan Awkward

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-38469472861459087712011-12-15T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-15T00:00:00.702-05:00

As you probably already know, Kate has a thing about Target, and the magical things that happen there, like tea parties and treasure hunts. She also likes to tell stories that she doesn't suck at telling.So we started seeing a trend a few days ago when emails started coming in that were telling us their stories about what happened when certain moms of MommyLand went out to their mailboxes and

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-43040356380830718372011-12-14T00:00:00.000-05:002011-12-14T00:00:03.102-05:00

The following is an actual text exchange between Kate & Lydia from last weekend.Lydia was actually at a Bowling Alley. At a fund raiser for an 11 year old with a life threatening illness. With her kids.Sigh... And that's why she should never text anyone ever.(c)Herding Turtles, Inc. 2009 - 2011

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6348968478261393602011-12-13T00:00:00.002-05:002011-12-13T00:00:12.895-05:00

The Grand Hooker Experiment is now 10 days old. It has blown our minds. And it has also totally blown up. As of today, we are -- sadly --no longer accepting names. The experiment, that we had hoped to run through December 20th, will end today - December 13th.Despite the enormous amounts of generosity and love that have flooded our inbox, there is just more need out there than we can help with.

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com133tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-8019059849079870322011-12-12T00:00:00.000-05:002011-12-12T00:00:00.877-05:00

Do you all remember my Aunt Mary? Well, she's awesome. If you're not familiar with her, please go read this. Go on. We'll wait.So the deal is my cousin David just got engaged. He's truly a great guy and is going to be an awesome husband. Obviously due to all the tremendous parenting he got. And so Aunt Mary is about to become a mother-in-law and is acutely aware of what a tough job that is.So

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com181tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-37700533232814420232011-12-10T09:56:00.010-05:002011-12-10T19:43:30.897-05:00

Dear Kate,You are a stupid, smelly pirate hooker. You are also probably the best looking 40 year old who does not live in Los Angeles, so please stop complaining that you haven't been to yoga in a long time.Ahem. Happy birthday.I don't know what I'd do without you. There would certainly be no Mommyland. Because even though I thought it would be a good idea, I never thought in a million years

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com35tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-62525143811555107572011-12-09T00:00:00.008-05:002011-12-09T08:59:01.965-05:00

Life changes drastically after you have kids. So I created a little photo essay on all the ways it is different.Sexy Time: Before Let's have a bottle of wine and enjoy a nice, long evening together.Sexy Time: After Hurry up. I think the kids are asleep.Big Night Out: BeforeLet's go out and get a mojito! Or five! WOOOO HOOO, Hooker!!Big Night Out: AfterI went to Target all by myself. It was

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-42151324750786218652011-12-07T17:58:00.006-05:002011-12-08T00:04:20.860-05:00

We are totally getting smarter! We started something on Friday and suddenly learned A LOT. Like well over 2,000 different pieces of information. Then we worked really, really hard for a few days and learned even more stuff -- like that fingers actually bleed from typing so much. Lydia is developing an upper back hump from sitting in front of her laptop. She really is! It's a hump from helping

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-45981465127069831162011-12-07T00:00:00.003-05:002011-12-07T08:30:25.515-05:00

Last Friday, we decided to try an experiment. You hookers know we love science and stuff. What we weren't prepared for? 1,400 emails in 2 days. And a couple hundred more every day after that. So please be patient with us, we're making great progress towards getting everyone matched but we're not there yet.We are so happy to be doing this and we are so grateful to all of you. And here are ten

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com75tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-57876651120270156392011-12-06T00:00:00.003-05:002011-12-08T23:07:37.254-05:00

Apparently, our deep and abiding love for military mamas is well known. Because two weeks ago, a very nice lady sent us this link and told us that her friend had made it and asked us to watch it.We did and immediately started stalking them both until they agreed to let us post it here. The gorgeous mama you see below told us to post away and we're thrilled to do so. Here's a little about our

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com52tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-61351951357212830892011-12-05T00:00:00.000-05:002011-12-05T00:00:06.555-05:00

You might have heard that we're Helping Hookers. Wait --no. We're not really helping people who are hookers; we are hookers who are helping other people.Anyway, you guys responded in such a spectacular fashion that 1) we were thrilled and want to dash all over the country like we're Ty Pennington and yelling out of vans that "Hey Hooker Family! We're here to help!" but also 2) busy as crap,

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-41457668782976296762011-12-02T00:00:00.004-05:002011-12-02T07:41:52.143-05:00

This week we posted something called The Domestic Enemies of the Low Income Mom. It was about Tara, a mom works full time, while pregnant, and raising two kids with her equally awesome husband. They're really broke, despite how hard they work. That day, people started emailing us, asking for Tara’s address so they could send her something. A business called 2 Chix even asked us if they could

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com114tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-14732477027465090092011-12-01T00:00:00.001-05:002011-12-01T00:00:05.194-05:00

I love children's stories. The Velveteen Rabbit and The Very Hungry Caterpillar and Alexander who had a crappy day and even the Pat the Bunny, even though I was kind of disappointed when McGee had to point out to me that his name isn't actually Pat. I just thought it was a happy coincidence that you patted Pat the Bunny.But it speaks to a larger problem that I have, and that is that I'm for crap

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com105tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-49679843329366860722011-11-30T00:00:00.002-05:002011-11-30T08:40:14.074-05:00

I hate sending holiday cards because I am so freaking bad at it. Every year, the whole process kicks my hindparts and reminds me that no matter how old I get, I will never be a real grown-up. Example? One year, I actually got all the cards done by the 20th of December. WIN! And then I found them under the passenger seat of my van six days later. FAIL. It’s a series of problems for me.  Let's

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-75249356288692722782011-11-29T00:00:00.004-05:002011-11-29T00:00:01.382-05:00

Today's post is from our pal Tara who wanted to tell us all about the schmidt that low income moms deal with every day.  Here's a little blurbitty blurb about her: Hi, my name is Tara and I am the mother of two boys, Peanut Butter who is 5 and Jelly who is 2. I am also expecting baby number three, and for many reasons which will become clear, this baby will certainly be our last. I am also

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com150tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-92122627693857262532011-11-28T00:00:00.006-05:002011-11-28T08:34:07.970-05:00

Every year my kids ask for things for Christmas that they stand no chance of actually getting. The reason for this tends to be that they only want the products that someone has spent a small fortune advertising on television. They are little Pavlovian monkeys. The TV tells them they want Moon Sand, and it's Moon Sand they want. So because we deal with this same thing every year, we present the

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com72tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-75228163487533966232011-11-26T21:48:00.000-05:002011-11-26T21:48:56.048-05:00

This is what the text messages between me and Kate looked like this the day before Thanksgiving: Lydia: Look at this, hooker. LOOK. Lydia: I'm buying them and I'm going to wear them like shoes. Always. Lydia: Because they're actually slippers. Lydia: But they're also shoes. The same way that Pajama Jeans are also pants. Kate: And then you can watch me die. Lydia: [evil laughing] -- Two hours

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com126tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-20646727715316650212011-11-21T00:00:00.001-05:002011-11-21T00:00:01.432-05:00

So in our quest to find that balance between the awesomeness that is MommyLand and the awesomeness that is our families, Kate and Lydia will be taking this week off to celebrate give thanks eat our way into bigger pants.But we do have a mission before you before we go...mostly inspired by the whacktacular dishwasher turkey that Kate's mother-in-law fixed last year. And while we wouldn't call the

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com46tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-13465741795290884412011-11-18T00:00:00.001-05:002011-11-18T00:00:00.694-05:00

For the past two weeks, we've been pretty obsessed with the whole notion of first world problems. So we asked you to share your problems with us and we asked The Badger, Mommy Shorts and Pregnant Chicken to choose the most funny, ridiculous and honest ones of the bunch. It turns out that was a pretty hard job.  There were hundreds to choose from.  To scroll through all of them, you can click

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-48242019987734624602011-11-17T00:00:00.004-05:002011-11-17T08:38:07.855-05:00

Go ahead, holidays. Try it. As you know, I'm totally obsessed with First World Problems. You also know that I'm a fashion trainwreck. And kind of a jackholian mess; disorganized and constantly behind on everything. The holidays make this much, much worse. Thanksgiving is next week and I'm already feeling it. I turn into a raging B. I'm miserable to be around because "CAN'T YOU PEOPLE SEE HOW

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-18637830095319645972011-11-16T00:00:00.004-05:002011-11-16T08:42:20.915-05:00

We got this from a self-proclaimed "lurker (stalker?)" and fell in love. We love when government agencies spend money on things before allowing people to proofread them.And, as ever, it spawned a flurry of texts...[Kate's phone bings, announcing a new text message]Kate: Shut UP!Lydia: I know...I'm so happy.Kate: Wait. Are we going to Boston?Lydia: I KNOW! They must be expecting us.Kate: Hold on..

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-65507951458696299282011-11-15T00:00:00.005-05:002011-11-15T00:00:04.815-05:00

If I squeeze hard enough, maybe you'll pass out and I can run away? Please? Christmas and Thanksgiving are just around the corner. Like, forty days away or something. Which should bring to mind all the warm, Norman Rockwell-y fuzzy thoughts of families gathered around fireplaces, singing carols and wrapping presents while sipping on a cup of something warm that we didn't have to make for

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-76126313648427962922011-11-14T00:00:00.001-05:002011-11-14T07:26:20.411-05:00

A couple of weeks ago, we ran a post talking about first world problems (made epic by a blogger called The Badger). We said if we got enough of them we'd compile our favorites into a list. Then we ran into a problem - the ones you sent us are so awesome, hilarious, honest, and brilliant that we can't pick. Also? They just keep coming.That made me feel good. Because the whole concept of first

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com230tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-6103393159402429682011-11-13T00:00:00.000-05:002011-11-13T18:54:55.878-05:00

It seems to me that one of the most important things that no one told me about parenthood is that three is worse than two. Everyone is sort of prepared for the Terrible Two’s. Very few of us are ready for what happens next. One of our brilliant readers suggested that people don't warn you about three for one reason. It's not that they hate you, it's that they can't bear to break it to you. Many

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com134tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-38836108791610306902011-11-11T00:00:00.008-05:002011-11-11T07:59:05.998-05:00

11/11/11 is Veteran's Day. (Here we pause, with heads bowed, to acknowledge the awesomeness of our armed forces. And also their families, who make an equally important sacrifice for all of us. Military mommies past and present - we honor you and the fact that you are badass ninjas. Sincerely, Kate & Lydia)For a really great post about being a mommy and a veteran, we suggest clicking over to

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-70762062460130698892011-11-10T00:00:00.001-05:002011-11-10T00:00:01.390-05:00

Remember Lionel Ritchie? And the Disney cups? We're not sure if the universe is just that crazy, or if we've become more susceptible to the whack over the past two years. Because it seems like every time we turn around, there's something else that we're pretty sure was manufactured just to screw with us.And, because we also like to pass the ca-razy around, Kate sent it to Lydia in a text message

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-85983083147919453722011-11-09T00:00:00.004-05:002011-11-09T08:20:04.649-05:00

I think my children believe magical fairies follow them around and put things away for them. There is nothing else that can explain the backpacks dropped at the front door, the how-many-days-in-a-row-did-you-wear-these socks on my pillow, and the toothbrush that I found in the refrigerator this afternoon. How long has that been there? And, is that crunchy toothpaste? Lefty is definitely my

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com44tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-51660474315123011672011-11-08T00:00:00.055-05:002011-11-08T00:00:05.881-05:00

When this guest post arrived - we were intrigued.  A reformed perfect mommy? And we thought, we really need to see what all this is about. Her experience is fascinating. Like a sociology experiment.  Reading this honestly made us feel a couple of different things: Relief, that even Gwyneths feel the pressure to be perfect and think it sucks. Happy, that our message of "we suck, but we're working

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com52tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-57113219076217406222011-11-07T00:00:00.005-05:002011-11-07T20:52:03.689-05:00

Just so you don’t think I’ve written something ridiculous thing like how you should obey your husband or anything, let me share with you the alternate title of this post:  “A couple of examples of when NOT to tune out the sound of your husband’s voice or you will really, really regret it”. I love my husband and think he is the funniest, smartest, coolest guy in the whole, wide world.  But

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-60731763986673305482011-11-04T00:00:00.005-04:002011-11-04T08:33:30.006-04:00

You know how I feel about Kim Kardashian and her svenjolly, the evil Keebler Ryan Seacrest?  So when I heard that Miss K was filing for divorce after 72 days of marriage, I did what anyone would do.  I went right to Twitter to see what punchlines were trending.  Guess who did the exact same thing?  Stark. Raving. Mad. Mommy.  Because we share a brain (except she got all the smart parts and I got

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com25tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-53388112454225896562011-11-03T00:00:00.003-04:002011-11-03T00:00:01.267-04:00

Last summer we got an email from a woman, an editor no less, whose name sounded almost exactly like this: Except her name is not really Andrea Zuckerman. So of course, we thought Stark.Raving.Mad.Mommy was pranking us. Then we realized she was an actual person who was an actual editor and we had gotten her name wrong and we felt like total jackholes. Especially when she offered us a job.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-83372445103604116762011-11-02T00:00:00.001-04:002011-11-02T00:00:00.297-04:00

We got this letter from our friend Miss T and we had to share her dilemma with you. The issue is something we've all dealt with.  You get pregnant and you want to wait to tell people.  Kate and I are BIG SUPPORTERS of people taking their time when it comes to spilling the beans.  It's your baby, your body and your business.  But keeping it a secret is hard.  How do you do it without lying?

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com101tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-91024173555664126032011-11-01T00:00:00.004-04:002011-11-01T00:00:02.088-04:00

Hello! After a month off to move into a new house, I’m back!  I missed you guys so much! ((embarrassingly long hug.)) Remember how just  before I left I was losing my damn mind because we were moving and the world is a chaotic and sometimes cruel place and I lack the ability to deal with anything like a mature adult.  But I was trying to keep focused on the words of The Bloggess in her now

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com266tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-82152513059820522012011-10-31T00:00:00.098-04:002011-10-31T00:00:00.470-04:00

I'm not a huge fan of Halloween, I'll admit it. Partly because I need someone to try and scare me right about as much as I need a pencil sticking out of my neck.  Partly because the IHPs always seem to have their six-month dental check-up right around now, which means I'm having to balance eleventy-seven pounds of chocolate deliciousness with the fact that I just spent my shoe money on having

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com40tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-24960680272993764392011-10-28T00:00:00.012-04:002011-10-28T00:00:08.708-04:00

Last year, Lydia discovered the Halloween-to-Holiday Death Spiral...you'd think that, a year later, with the kids older and wiser and more capable of fending for themselves, we might be a little smarter and able to get a teensy bit ahead of the crap that is going to rain down on us for the next six weeks. You'd think that. But noooo. We're not any smarter. We're just older. In last year's pants.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com87tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-79719267347783309972011-10-27T00:00:00.067-04:002011-10-27T00:00:02.998-04:00

So, we got a lot of comments recently about kids who don't look like their parents...and you parents of redheads seem to get more questions than any parent should have about how their little Ginger came to be. So, Kate enlisted the help of Guru Louise, because her little man has the most awesomest head of hair in the history of ever. It's totally en fuego. Kate tried to write this post, as Happy

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com134tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-41628072283777280732011-10-26T00:00:00.145-04:002011-10-26T00:00:03.342-04:00

See, this is why we love you. We find something totally innocent, like an innocuous metal hook behind a door, and what do we see? An angry octopus who's trying to fight us. [Editor's Note: Let's be clear. This is all Kate. SHE is the one who sees strange pugilistic animals. Lydia sees a lovely solution to putting her purse on the bathroom floor.] And then we sent you on a mission to find your own

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-35770903905435724602011-10-25T00:00:00.001-04:002011-10-25T00:00:07.275-04:00

Many of us have dealt with the wonderous world of daycare. Our new friend Julie (who leaves the most hilarious comments in the history of ever) tells all about the domestic enemies of the mom whose kids are in day care. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Hi, my name is Julie (Hi, Julie). I write ilikebeerandbabies.com about the effects of mixing alcohol

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com89tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-77485064234228831172011-10-24T00:00:00.004-04:002011-10-24T00:00:07.311-04:00

Maybe let's just have vanilla, OK? We got this the other day, and -- as expected -- we died. We also realized that Julie is a much, much better person that either Kate or Lydia...because it took her YEARS to realize what we saw in about .0000007 seconds. And that is, that ANYTHING can sound really porny. ------------------------ So, this poster hangs on the wall in the chain-coffee-store

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-65293919685821510962011-10-21T00:00:00.000-04:002011-10-21T07:40:57.321-04:00

Except imagine that these are all moms who drove to the show in their vans. Last month at baseball practice, I ran into our friend Sarah. Sarah is a blogging genius. She writes here and here and here. Also here. All of it is awesome.  She also does social media for people.  So she casually mentions in our conversation, like its no big deal, that she has a new client.  The band Duran Duran.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com22tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-82792521253240098992011-10-20T02:44:00.000-04:002011-10-20T02:44:33.373-04:00

I don't think that's anatomically correct... Just to set the scene: Lydia was frantically shuttling between her old house and her new house, trying to get everything moved before the LTSs returned from school. Kate was frantically shuttling through the airport in Atlanta, trying to make a flight. Kate opened up the Belle email. Lydia opened up the Buzz email. We imagine that we both said WHUCK

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-67836577140222764332011-10-19T00:00:00.002-04:002011-10-19T00:00:00.584-04:00

It really, really does. WINNING. Somewhere deep in my twisted imagination lives an advertising executive. An industry legend cloistered away high in his corner office on Madison Avenue. He is an elderly marketing oracle in a fedora and a sharkskin suit. When modern day Mad Men get stuck for a concept, they consult him. They bring gifts of Cuban cigars and single malt and Perry Cuomo records.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-85191322327613164282011-10-18T00:00:00.002-04:002011-10-18T07:47:15.303-04:00

This guest post comes to you from our VERY DEAR FRIEND Mandy. You might also know her as one of the team leaders from our Spark Team. Kate & I have an unnatural fondness for the women who run the Rants from Mommyland Team on Spark.  They are ...  amazing.  Here's a little more about our beloved Mandy and her take on the enemies that moms of preemies deal with. Read more from her at: http://

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com80tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-65938408263867066122011-10-17T00:00:00.033-04:002011-10-17T00:00:02.033-04:00

I don't really need to pee anymore...  We got this from one of our "devoted readers" -- and yes, that is *exactly* how she asked us to describe her. Devoted Reader, we use those quotes a lot too, mostly around words like "totally sane" and "not drunk." Anyway, "Devoted Reader" was at her kiddos school and found this lovely, little Whuck posted in the bathroom. All we could think when we read

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-49150199396758499602011-10-14T00:00:00.040-04:002011-10-14T00:00:07.430-04:00

We haven't learned squat. School has been in session for a while now. We expect that our children are learning some good, useful, knowledge-enhancing skills that will give them the springboard to a bright and successful futur--oh who are we kidding. They're learning how to give wedgies and Indian Burns. And this stuff: 10. “Mrs. Peterson said that mommies should not send notes to teachers

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com11tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-89329938086121504842011-10-13T00:00:00.003-04:002011-10-13T00:00:08.063-04:00

Lydia, WHUCK is that?? Lydia and Kate text. A lot. All the time. Mostly, the texts consist of calling each other a hooker and Lydia informing Kate of Mini's latest disasters. [Editor's Note: Speaking of which, Lydia moved into her new FANCY house this past weekend, and Mini has already flooded the bathroom. How? By shoving an entire roll of TP into the toilet and then flushing it. - Kate] 

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com14tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-62339370058474842612011-10-12T00:00:00.001-04:002011-10-12T00:00:02.689-04:00

Lydia and Kate are on the phone talking about politics... Lydia: Lately I've been getting a lot of phone calls from people wanting to ask me questions about politics. Isn't that funny? Kate: I guess so, given that all you read is this blog and all you watch on TV is Phinneas & Ferb. And vampire porn. Lydia: Ahem. Vampire porn is over until next season.  But I know. I'm an idiot. I know nothing.

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com30tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-22175891444277627902011-10-11T00:00:00.001-04:002011-10-11T00:00:03.885-04:00

Doesn't it look delicious? Well, you can't have any because it's poison. This long overdue post about kids with food allergies come to us from our friend Portia, a working mother of two (an almost 5 year old girl and an almost 3 year old boy). She is awesome and funny and brutally honest about what it's like to have a kid with food allergies. -------------------------------------------------

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com131tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-70031040568054643132011-10-10T00:00:00.079-04:002011-10-10T00:00:08.015-04:00

Lefty and Happy have been playing what we call Fall Ball. Which you would *think* means something about baseball in the autumn. Turns out it just means playing ball with a whole lot more falling down. Kate -- as expected -- took her handy dandy newspaper and trusty Sharpie. It's amazing what happens even when there's no alcohol around...  Dad: "Dan." Other Dad: "Mike. Nice to meet you." Dad: "

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com26tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-69976586545260628112011-10-07T00:00:00.000-04:002011-10-07T00:00:01.217-04:00

So, as we told you last week, after being super important "consultants" to the Second City/Totino's Pizza Stuffers commercial shoot, we got to interview the cast members. We had a series of very important MommyLand questions, like whether the following were good or evil: Seacrest PajamaJeans Dora Crocs Drive-thrus Target Chuck E. Cheese and...wine in a box Then there were the really important

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-8874755508720844712011-10-06T00:00:00.001-04:002011-10-06T08:16:02.806-04:00

Remember when we asked our kids what Rule #1 was? And we got answers that maybe were slightly indicative of the idea that we weren't exactly teaching the right things? Well, now that our sweet six children are now in the capable and competent hands of people who DO teach the right things -- and are conveniently paid to do just that -- we thought we'd see what what they liked best about school,

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-43586511624909888572011-10-05T00:00:00.001-04:002011-10-05T00:00:02.567-04:00

Last year, I discussed how I fall victim to distracted driving all the damn time and how it is very bad and dangerous and worse than driving drunk and how basically I am an unsafe at any speed a-hole. Remember this? Last week I got rear-ended by a 21 year old in her new BMW.  There is just nothing right about that sentence.  I for one, do not enjoy a rear-ending.  But by a 21 year old in a

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-38488373263314639352011-10-04T00:00:00.000-04:002011-10-04T00:00:04.763-04:00

A lot of dads are involved and engaged with their kids.  That is awesome and of course, exactly as it should be.  What we didn't realize was that those good dads, the ones we love? Get their share of crap, too.This post came to us from the very Rob Kristoff, who you can read lots more from at: http://www.ourdaysarejustfilled.com/ and http://www.robkristoffwriting.blogspot.com/. -----------------

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com34tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-92102672108069153772011-10-03T20:00:00.000-04:002011-10-03T20:00:02.135-04:00

Happy and I were waiting at the Kiss 'n' Ride line at school this morning. K 'n' R makes him slightly nervous because he feels the need to have a conversation with whichever teacher comes to retrieve him, and he needs to come up with a topic. I suggested a couple of options -- the beach, Spider-man, possible snow -- none of which proved to be acceptable small talk in his mind. Principal came to

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com16tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-61373232379724722232011-10-03T16:00:00.000-04:002011-10-03T16:00:02.543-04:00

As if we haven't talked about Chicago enough...you wanna know the best part? The postcard. For the record, we accosted this guy at O'Hare Airport at 5:30 in the morning. That we're still alive is a testament to our awesomeness...also, our ability to run. To: MommyLand From: Kate and Lydia Email Subject: We're not dying...yet.  Email Message:We're not sure what his plans are, but we're not

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-63329927537370592532011-10-03T12:00:00.001-04:002011-10-03T12:00:07.467-04:00

Lydia was just sitting in her house, writing a post and minding her own business, when the telephone rang. Lydia is pretty sure it was Kate, because all there was on the other end of the phone was snorting and something about the airport being porny. And then Kate's latest postcard arrived... To: Lydia E-mail Subject: I'm dead Message: LOOK! It's a perfect place to charge my Precious. [

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-34302830711748580182011-10-03T00:00:00.000-04:002011-10-03T00:00:01.288-04:00

Kate's new job has her out in the world again. First, she would like to apologize to the world. Second, she would also like to thank it for giving her the most awesome postcards in the history of ever.  To: Lydia Subject Line: Umm, I think this hotel room was expecting me. Email message: Should I be offended that the bathroom is calling me a HO? Or have we gotten to the point where I

Kate M.http://www.blogger.com/profile/09061164768212443905noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-3850361131789102572011-09-29T12:00:00.003-04:002011-09-29T20:15:37.677-04:00

Guess what?! For some reason we don't really understand, Totino's Pizza Stuffers and Second City Communications are letting us run these videos as a preview before they get widely released on YouTube.  So if you were interested in checking them out, at least for right now you can only see them here. I know, right? We're so professional, it's not even f*cking funny. Hey, also? If you have any

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com71tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-39259725960798383032011-09-29T00:00:00.008-04:002011-09-29T20:14:32.245-04:00

This is the conclusion of our epic 24 hour adventure where we went to Chicago to do some sort of project with Totino's Pizza Stuffers and Second City Communications except once we got there we had no idea what it was. Parts One, Two, and Three can be found right here. -------------------------------------------------------- For sure, observing the actors was the best part of the whole experience

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com12tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-7133388665967272152011-09-28T00:00:00.005-04:002011-09-28T12:10:38.619-04:00

For those of you who missed the first two installments of this epic odyssey, Kate & Lydia flew to Chicago to watch Second City improv actors film a series of internet videos depicting casting sessions to be the next Totino’s Pizza Stuffers Mom. We felt pretty cool about the whole thing until we got there and realized we had no idea what the hell was going on. Part One and Part Two are right here.

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-38519038958172702662011-09-27T00:00:00.000-04:002011-09-27T00:10:47.971-04:00

For those of you who missed yesterday, Kate & I got a real honest to goodness blogger job that meant we got to fly to Chicago and watch a bunch of Second City improv actors film a series of internet videos depicting casting sessions to be the next Totino’s Pizza Stuffers Mom. By job I mean of course “not paid in actual money, even Candian dollars which are probably made up anyway (no offense, Amy

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com20tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-69715903748128688982011-09-26T00:00:00.002-04:002011-09-26T00:00:00.179-04:00

A couple of weeks ago, we got an email from someone who was all “I’ve got a proposition for you, Kate & Lydia!” We get those emails all the time. Mostly, they’re from nice ladies in Sierra Leone who just need our bank account numbers and PINS and then we can be rich and help orphans at the same time. But this time it was different. This was a nice lady who works for a big PR company. And her

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-21931594236954290062011-09-23T00:00:00.004-04:002011-09-23T00:00:04.197-04:00

Hi. I’m sort of a head case right now. People keep asking me if I’m losing weight, which normally would make me super happy and want to wiggle my fanny for them a little bit. But today it just reminds me that I’ve forgotten to eat again. If you know me, you will understand the significance of that statement. I don’t forget to eat. That’s not me. Once my blood sugar bottoms out, it takes a day to

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com71tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-58299361370986087572011-09-22T00:00:00.000-04:002011-09-22T00:00:09.015-04:00

Today's guest post comes from our pal Becky, who was one of the first people to read our blog that we were not actually related to.  So we totally love her.  Here's a little blurbitty blurb all about her: Hi! My name is Becky and I’m a SAH Military Mom to 3 adorable monsters ages 6,4 and 2. My husband is currently deployed to Againistan and this is our third deployment although the other

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com90tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-67770791200537262312011-09-21T00:00:00.000-04:002011-09-21T00:00:08.929-04:00

And why is it warm? I deal with disgusting crap all the time. Its one of the things no one tells you about parenting. That within ten minutes of becoming a mom you will begin constantly dealing with things that would make most Marines puke.  I had no idea, but I have come to accept it as normal.  In fact, in addition to being somewhat famous for being a giant boobstain - I am also well known

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com71tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-16076640956690959042011-09-20T00:00:00.000-04:002011-09-20T00:00:10.441-04:00

We've been waiting for this post for a loooooong time.  It came to us from our awesome new friend Jenster, who you can read all about on her blog Visitors' Day at the Institute. ------------------------------------------------------------------------ We are a half-Asian, half-Scandinavian family. My son is 14 and my daughter is 10. And yes, we do kind of look like a Gap ad, if the Gap models

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com56tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-85225546608021932122011-09-16T00:00:00.006-04:002011-09-16T13:12:08.287-04:00

Yesterday's post was all about dealing with other people's kids in your house. It reminded me of a video I saw last week, created by the BRILLIANT AND AMAZING GENIUSES at Second City.  I am totally in awe of them and their awesomeness.  Last week, Kate & I went to Chicago to observe their antics first hand and we laughed so hard we cried pretty much all day long. More on that next week... So

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com15tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-21912644475944915642011-09-15T00:00:00.001-04:002011-09-15T00:00:02.627-04:00

We've all been there.  Someone else's kids behaving really badly and you have to deal with it diplomatically when you really want to lose your schmidt.  But this case is a little more complicated. Please help this woman. -------------------------------------------------------- Dear Kate & Lydia, I've had this dilemma and I've been trying to get some perspective on it. Let me preface my

Lydia and Katehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01359308152002227423noreply@blogger.com149tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3744857965037745657.post-86812227264637345122011-09-14T00:00:00.000-04:002011-09-14T07:57:13.533-04:00

I care about nutrition. I really do. As a mom, its my job to make sure my kids aren't eating crap all the time.  When it comes to what I feed myself, however - it's pretty sad.  Like many other mothers I know, I am fixated on having happy, healthy, emotionally stable children while slowly going insane and totally ignoring my own needs and health. My tooth broke in half last year and it took my

Lydia B.http://www.blogger.com/profile/15769694459218666561noreply@blogger.com74